


Heartstrings

by apunks



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Bands, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Humor, Cheating, Multi, Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-21
Updated: 2014-09-18
Packaged: 2018-02-09 21:17:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 21,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1998159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apunks/pseuds/apunks
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi’s scared to fall in love again, but he knows that she will make it impossible.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Wake Up, Let's Face The World

**Author's Note:**

> Basically, this is an AU where Levi is Alex Turner and Hanji, Mike, and Eren are Nick, Jamie, and Matt (respectively.) Erwin and the others are their road crew and this is gonna be a fun ride.

“Wakey, wakey, eggs and bakey!”

“Go away, Hanji.”

“Not until you get up, Levi.”

Levi groans, pulls his blanket over his head, and snuggles it into his very comfy pillow. _Obviously_ , Hanji doesn’t know how to knock, nor does she know that breaking into someone’s house is very, very _rude_. He feels her poking his ribs, her hand brushing against very sensitive skin, so he jumps, pushes his blanket off in high speed, and glares at her with the scariest eyes and frown he can muster. It’s still eight, too early for Levi to be mad at anybody and too early for him to be glaring at anyone. It’s also too early for him to be seeing people, but Hanji obviously doesn’t know that.

“What are you _doing_ , Hanji?” Levi asks her. It’s kind of like he hisses at her, because something that sounds like a hiss comes out from his mouth. He’s not fully awake yet, but the sun’s out and it’s way too bright and he just wants to go back to sleep. All he does now is sleep. Maybe it’s because he stays outside all night, strumming his guitar and writing songs on the balcony until his fingers are numb and his eyes are half-shut. He doesn’t sleep until three in the morning now, and most of the nights he’s outside on the balcony, his neighbors tell him to shut up, so really it isn’t worth it. But he enjoys it, he likes to write songs that people enjoy and people like to relate to. _Hidden break-up songs_ , the prestigious music magazine _Sina_ wrote about their latest album _Nights_. _Probably the gateway to leading man, Levi Rivaille’s, heart. The raw guitar solos and heartfelt vocals and breathtaking drumming makes this album one of their best. The Titans have done it again. If we were to describe this album in one word, we would have to go with the word our editor-in-chief used, “Iconic.”_

Levi doesn’t know if he can top “iconic.” Iconic is a pretty big, pretty important word, and Sina’s a pretty big, pretty important magazine. He doesn’t even know how they made it this far. They started as a garage band, making music in Hanji’s boyband poster-filled room until it turned dark and they had to go home. It was college, a really hard time for all of them, but for some reason, they made it.

But even though they made it, Levi’s not going to sacrifice sleep for fame. It’s just not worth it. Maybe someone like Eren would, but Levi’s not Eren, and he hopes he never will be Eren because he’s seen Eren’s life and he’s not interested.

Hanji pokes his side again, pulling him out of his trance. (She always seems to do that, and Levi doesn’t know how to feel about it. Is that good or bad? Did he appreciate it or not? He’s still unsure. Emotions are very hard to convey.) “Wake up, Levi,” she says, tugging his arm towards the door. “Erwin just called and told me that we have to go to the offices soon. He also asked why you didn’t answer your phone. Is it on vibrate?”

Levi pulls his arm from Hanji’s grasp and grabs his phone. **Bossy Tall Blonde - 5 Missed Calls**. Yeah, he knows he’s going to get so much shit from Erwin. He can practically feel Erwin’s spit landing on his right cheek.

“God damn it, Hanji, get out,” he says, grabbing a pillow and flinging it at her. She catches it with ease (maybe because of her supreme softball skills) and slides it underneath her arm. Smiling, she heads out the door and shuts it all the way.

Levi sighs, gets up, and heads towards the bathroom. When he looks at himself in the mirror, he sees that his jet black hair is everywhere, and it looks like he’s getting one-day scruff. His eyes look miserably dead (although he supposes they always look that way), and his mouth feels very dry. Brushing his teeth is the best idea he can think of at the moment, because his mind is still hazy and the light is still too bright and god damn it, he just wants sleep.

After making himself look somewhat presentable, Levi pulls on a dress shirt and a pair of jeans he folded last night and exits the room smelling of very expensive cologne. He makes his way to the kitchen, where the sound of rushing water is, and that makes him very excited because finally, someone in this damn lazy band is cleaning. It ends up being Hanji cleaning the pan she used to make pancakes.

“Ah, the king’s finally woken up,” she says with a little laugh afterwards. Levi rolls his eyes, punches her shoulder softly, and grabs the plate of pancakes waiting on the table for him. He sees Mike and Eren eating pancakes on the couch and decides to join them.

They are watching the news. It’s on the channel with the pretty newscaster Eren drools over every day, but today, Eren’s drooling over pancakes and Mike’s completely focused on what the weather will be today. “Oi,” Levi gruffly mumbles, “no crumbs on my couch. Understand? Or you’ll be working your asses off to clean it.” He narrows his eyes on Eren. “I’m talking to you, Jaeger. Mostly to you."

“Good morning, sleeping beauty,” Eren says, glancing at Levi for a second before focusing back on the TV. “I take it that you woke up on the wrong side of the bed today.”

“Shut up,” Levi says. He cuts the pancakes into equal pieces and carefully puts it into his mouth. They taste soggy now that the syrup’s been there for almost five minutes, but they’re good, nonetheless. Hanji’s pancakes always taste good. He eats for a few minutes before asking, “Where’s Mikasa?” Eren’s eyes slowly trail back to Levi.

“Why do you want to know?” he asks. Levi shrugs while Eren’s mouth quirks up into what looks to be a smirk. “Do you like her?”

“Don’t smirk like that, it’s ugly,” Levi tells him. Eren scoffs and rolls his eyes back to the TV. “But really, where is she?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Eren says with that ugly smirk still on his face. Jesus, if he could, Levi would slap him all the way to the moon, or even farther if Eren annoys him further.

“I’m just asking a damn question,” Levi grumbles. “And I would like a damn answer.”

“Where else would she be, Levi?” Eren asks him, eyes finally looking at Levi. He rolls his eyes and takes a deep breath and sighs once again. “She always brings Erwin coffee in the morning. It’s not like she does anything else.”

Mike switches the television to the home cooking channel and Eren shrieks. “You aren’t watching,” Mike mumbles, “so I changed it.”

Levi can still hear, “God damn it, Mike, she was almost on screen, give the remote back!” He can still see Hanji trying to sedate a crying Eren and slapping a smug-looking Mike. But his mind is far away, from its usual place, and for some reason, he’s thinking about Mikasa.

 

***

 

They get to the offices, which is just a towering skyscraper that had the words _PIXIS RECORDS_ inscripted on top of it. The main boss, Dot Pixis, currently resides on the top floor, so the building is basically his home and office. Levi’s only seen Mr. Pixis twice, and because of that, Dot Pixis remains a mystery.

Eren parks in front of the valet station. “We’re here,” he says, taking the key out of the slot and stretching his back.

“Dumbass, we know,” Levi says.

“Jesus, you don’t have to be mean, Levi,” Hanji says while nudging Levi’s side. “Let’s just go.”

They all get out at the same time. Levi heads in first, Hanji second, Mike third, and Eren last because he had to throw the keys to the valet boy who was too busy staring at Levi to bother to look at Eren. The whole building is so busy, the glass chandelier lighting the whole room seemed to be swinging in sync with the steps people are taking. Receptionists take calls every seven seconds, mail boys are pushing carts everywhere, and the late office workers are hurriedly trying to get to their stations. The whole room looks sleek and modern, with the steel pillars and minimalistic furniture all over the place. It smells of bleach and Febreeze, and for that reason, Levi feels right at home.

“It smells like Levi’s house,” Eren scoffs. He stuffs his hands into his jacket pockets and adds, “I thought we were going to get away from the smell.”

Levi rolls his eyes, pushes the elevator’s UP button, and says, “It smells good. Shut up.”

“Yes, sir,” Eren says, giving Levi a fake salute while laughing. “You’re so strict, it scares me.”

Hanji laughs as they get in the elevator. “Imagine Levi having kids. Those kids are going to be obedient as hell.” Levi sticks his tongue out distastefully. Kids are the last thing on his mind right now. He’s still twenty-nine, and he still has a lot of life left, so he’d like it if they _don’t_ mention kids. He’d rather churn out records than kids.

“ _God_ , Hanji, that’s the worst thing you’ve said about me ever,” he says, pushing the thirty-ninth button. When they get to Erwin’s floor, they step out and see a blonde man working at the secretary desk, typing faster than one hundred words per minute. The first thing Levi says to him is, “Where’s Annie?”

“Mr. Rivalle!” the blonde says, eyes wide and breathing heavy. When he looks at the rest of the band, he calms down. “Hi guys!"

“Armin?” Eren asks. His eyes become wide when he rushes towards Armin’s desk. “Jesus Christ, Armin, you got a job here at Pixis?”

“Yeah!” Armin says excitedly. He nods his head and pulls out a paper that looks like his resume. “I met Mr. Smith at a coffee shop and he asked if I was working anywhere. I told him no, because I seemed to be overqualified for most of the jobs I’ve applied for, and all he did was take one look at my resume and hired me immediately!”

“Where’s Annie?” Levi presses on. Armin whips his head back to Levi and swallows thickly. Eren’s eyes are still on his resume, mouth gaping at all the accomplishments that Armin has. Levi glances at the resume, and he’s quite impressed. But his face doesn’t betray him, because he has a reputation to keep.

“Annie’s been promoted to publicist, sir,” Armin says, voice wavering at the end. “The moment she got the degree, Mr. Smith promoted her.”

“God damn Erwin,” Levi mumbles under his breath. Erwin’s always been too nice, and Levi doesn’t know whether or not that’s a good thing. “We’re here, lead us in.”

Of course Mikasa’s arms are around Erwin’s chest. She’s hugging him from behind, lips close to his face, and head snuggling against his neck. Erwin must feel so damn good, because his hand is cupping her head and pulling her closer. Levi coughs to get their attention.

“Oh, you’re here,” Erwin says as he looks up from their snuggling. He glances at his watch before looking up and saying, “Damn, you’re early.”

“Erwin, language,” Mikasa sternly says, tapping his nose. She lets go of his hand, but he holds on, letting her slip away as she walks towards Eren. “Did you eat breakfast?” she asks her (annoying, Levi would like to add) younger brother. Eren groans, walks to the couch in the living room set Erwin has in his office, and lies down.

“ _Christ_ , Mikasa, when am I going to be treated like a man?”

“When you start acting like one,” she counters. Hanji _oohs_  in the background.

“Anyways,” Erwin says, “we can start the meeting now.” He puts on his suit jacket and leads them out, Levi following right behind him and the rest, even new secretary Armin, following behind Levi.

“I heard Annie got promoted,” Levi mumbles. His hand is gripping the lighter hidden in his pocket. It feels cold and smooth, much like his heart. At least that’s what he likes to think it feels like. You can’t actually feel a heart, that’s impossible unless you’re a cardiac surgeon. Levi doesn’t have the time nor the patience to do that. “That’s pretty generous.”

Erwin pushes the meeting room’s door open. Levi sees Krista and Annie already there, with Krista making coffee and Annie scribbling words onto a paper. “We needed a publicist after Erd quit last year because of the shit you put him through.”

“That wasn’t even hard to cover up, damn it,” Levi mumbles under his breath. Erwin takes his seat, and everyone else follows his example.

“Coffee?” Krista asks Levi. He thinks about it, because coffee does sound good right now but so does a cigarette. Since he can’t smoke indoors, he says yes, and she gives him a piping hot cup of freshly-brewed coffee. It tastes great, because Erwin doesn’t like shit coffee, and it’s strong so it can wake up sleep-deprived workers and get them to do their jobs. Levi’s one of those sleep-deprived workers. Erwin got the good kind of coffee for the office at Levi’s request.

“You look great today, Annie,” Eren says, giving Annie a smile. She glances at him before focusing back on her paper. Levi snorts.

“Not so great with the ladies today.” Eren just rolls his eyes and sits down in the seat next to Levi.

“Let’s start this meeting,” Erwin says. Krista takes her seat next to Armin, everyone becomes quiet as Erwin’s slides pop up on the projector screen, and Levi’s mind wanders to who knows where. Work, as usual.

 

***

 

“Have you packed your bags yet, Levi?"

Levi snaps back into reality, and he sees Krista’s blue eyes staring intently at him. Creepy is an understatement in this situation, because baby blues don’t usually stare at dark grays. Unexpected maybe. There are many complex words to describe this, but Levi can’t think of one yet.

“No,” he says, sipping his cold coffee. He sees that everyone’s already gotten up to stretch. Hanji and Mike are chattering at the coffee machine, Erwin’s talking on the phone, Eren’s still trying to get Annie’s attention, and Armin’s playing on his computer. It’s weird that Krista’s trying to make a conversation with him, because she used to always try to avoid him. He used to think something was off about her, but it turns out she’s just very shy. She’s come out of shell since then.

But this whole communication thing between them is very odd. She nods, still staring at him, and says, “Are you excited that you guys are going on a world tour?”

“It’s an accomplishment, yeah,” he tells her. “It’s really just a plain tour blown up internationally, but at the end of the day, it’s what I love to do, and I’m grateful for all of you for working so hard to get us here.” He looks at her and nods. “So thanks. Hope you love what you do too.”

“I do,” she says, and then she smiles. He notices that she always seems to smile, even if she’s under so much shit. It amazes Levi, really, because she has the greatest tolerance level out of everyone that works here, and how she does it is still a mystery. They’re all very stressed, and their jobs are hard, Krista’s no exception. It may seem like all she does is grab coffees for everyone, but she’s really a stage manager for Erwin. She grabs coffee for them at meetings just because she’s nice. She doesn’t have to do it. Levi’s always wondered why she does it, if there’s some interior motive for this. But he knows it’s just because she’s nice enough to work extra.

He nods, acknowledging her. Silent, he’s always silent, and he’s not much of a conversation-starter, so it’s awkward after that. After Erwin gets off the phone, he says, “You’re all dismissed. See you tomorrow morning.” He waves bye to Krista and heads with his band downstairs to the parking lot so they can all go home and he can finally get some damn sleep before this world tour starts. It might be the last time he’s ever going to get a good rest, so he’s gonna cherish it.

 

 


	2. From Dawn to Dusk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi reunites with the crew again and realizes how fucking noisy they are.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alriiight this is another installment of this fic and it's funny i like it and it is beta'd so don't worry for mistakes.
> 
> also it's 6k+ words beware

_December_

 

Certainly, Levi’s not one to just merely stuff items into his bags. He’s not like Eren, who doesn’t really give a shit about whatever the hell he’s packing. Levi needs to keep up that suave, cleanly look everyone seems to love.

Hair gel, check. That needs to be in his bag. Expensive Armani cologne that Erwin got him for his birthday, check. Enough pants to last him for the many activities of the week, check. He pauses, looks at his jeans, and folds it nicely.

His phone suddenly rings. From the ringtone, he can tell already that it’s Eren calling, because Eren changed it to a screeching sound that Levi _hates_ but can’t seem to change. It’s sentimental, maybe. Sentimental yet annoying. He rolls up his shirt sleeves to his forearms before grabbing his phone and tapping _answer_.

“I don’t have the right shirts to bring,” Eren tells him, voice muffled from the other line. Levi sighs, puts Eren on speaker, and continues folding his clothes and placing them in his suitcase. The clothes are ironed, free of any wrinkles, and to add to that, free of any imperfections. Levi takes great pride in being well-prepared. Eren, on the other hand, is known for being unprepared almost all the time.

Levi stares at his suitcase and looks for anything else he needs to bring. He already has two other suitcases packed. Nothing seems to be missing, but the pit of his stomach is telling him something else. It’s odd that Levi gets premonitions whenever he forgets to pack something. His sixth sense, Hanji calls it, and it caught on so that’s what everyone started calling it. Tie, that’s it. He forgot his best tie. “Not my problem, Jaeger,” he says, walking towards his closet with his phone in his hand. He grabs the remote on the top of one of the many drawers in his closet, presses the button, and heads toward the drawer that is opening to grab his tie.

“I need to borrow a shirt, Levi,” Eren says. Levi can hear the sound of rushing water dripping down to the sink. The sound of water hitting sinks has a distinct sound, and everyone would agree with Levi on that, but not without thinking he’s a freak first. Who does think about stuff like that? It’s weird, but Levi’s always been weird, so he decides that it’s okay.

“I’m not letting you borrow a shirt,” Levi mumbles, pressing the button again to close the drawer. He can hear a gasp from the other line. “Isn’t your sister our stylist, Eren? Have you forgotten that? I’m sure she has extra shirts hidden somewhere. Maybe you can borrow one of Erwin’s.”

“Erwin doesn’t come to our house,” Eren informs him. “Are you kidding me? Mikasa goes to his house instead because she knows I’m going to embarrass her, but it makes no sense because he’s my boss?” He exhales loudly, turning off the water and walking to somewhere else.

“Erwin’s her boss too, I hope your IQ hasn’t decreased since we first met,” Levi tells him. Eren snorts (louder than he exhaled) and walks into a room. Levi can hear his footsteps and his door slamming. It’s a mystery why Mikasa hasn’t moved out yet.

“You know what, I’ll ask Mike. Or maybe Hanji has some of her ex-boyfriend’s shirts. Hah, ex-boyfriend material.”

“Bye, Eren. You’re a loser.”

“Bye, Levi. You’re a--”

Levi presses the _end_ button before Eren can say anything else. He already knows it’s going to be stupid.

**Thanks, asshole. I was gonna say “great guy,” but I guess that you’re just itching to be an asshole. So there. Asshole.**

_You’re not very nice._

**Sue me.**

_I wish I can, but you’re part of my band, so that’ll make no sense._

**Haha, very funny.**

Levi puts his phone down after that. He zips up his suitcase, rolls it towards the others, and lies down on his bed. At last, sleep.

 

***

 

The alarm wakes him up at three, but they’re not supposed to leave until lunchtime. He can’t go back to sleep again, because there’s too much to do, too much on his mind, and you can’t go to sleep while you’re racing for to the finish line. And so, with that, he grabs his guitar and sits on the balcony again, notebook on the small, dusty table and pencil right next to it.

He set up that alarm so he knows when enough is enough and it’s time to go to sleep. He works himself to the bone, fingers stinging because he’s plucking guitar strings and ass numb because he’s been sitting for far too long in the same position.

He strums a few chords, sings a few lyrics, but they don’t match. He scratches words out again, writes in new words, scratches, writes, scratches, writes, scratches, writes. It’s the same thing over and over again, really; it’s very monotonous.

_From the bottom of my heart, I thank you, because there’s nothing left to do now that you’ve left._

“Yeah,” he says to himself, “I like that.”

_You’ve left the baby, you’ve killed the love, you’re a homewrecker, you’re making it rough._

He strums the guitar, hitting the right notes every time. He’s glad for that.

_They used to tell me that you’re no good, now baby, I know, I know._

He hears the sound of a window opening. The guy in the apartment next door is yelling at him again, his heavy voice drifting with the wind.

_We used to shit talk about everyone all night, now I hope you don’t shit talk me with another boy next to you._

“Fucking hell, superstar, some of us are trying to sleep!”

You might have left, you might have gone,

“Jesus Christ, Carla, tell this punk to shut the hell up, I can’t deal with this,” he yells, turning back into the room. Levi can hear Carla’s timid voice telling him to calm down.

_I wanna tell you that I hope he’s not fucking you over, but also I want to tell you that I’m still not fucking over you too._

“Go to sleep!”

“Damn it,” Levi mumbles, picking up the broken led on the paper. He angrily glares at the man shouting from the window next door. “Why don’t you shut the fuck up and leave people alone?”

“I can say the same for you!” he yells, shutting the window with a bang. Levi scoffs, picks up the notebook, picks up the pencil, picks up his guitar, and goes inside. He feels sorry for Carla. She’s married to one of the many assholes in this world.

 

***

 

Three hours later, he decides to fix up breakfast. He’s been awake for four hours already, but he doesn’t care because the tour doesn’t start until tomorrow. He just needs to get to the venue early.

They don’t leave until lunch. Hanji’s going to pick him up with Mike probably already in the passenger seat, so he has to be stuck in the back. It isn’t ideal, because he doesn’t really like the backseat (the reason being Eren might be right next to him). The only good thing about it is that he really enjoys backseat driving. It drives Hanji crazy.

The room is still dim. Only television lights flicker in the background, reflecting white beams towards the aggressively white walls, and he can only say it adds brightness, not color. The coffee smells fantastic, if you can count stale coffee beans in hot water as coffee. It tastes bland, not the kind of drink he’d like in the morning, but it still had some caffeine in it. In his disillusioned state, it’s acceptable.

Last night he had a total of eight hours of sleep. He passed out at eight last night and woke up at three. Everything’s still hazy; his mind is as dim as the room, but it’ll brighten up in a few hours, give or take. At least, he hopes it will. He decides, whatever, he’ll sleep in the plane. First class has it’s perks.

He can hear his neighbor’s daughter playing Clair De Lune as quietly as she can. She’s silent, probably so she doesn’t wake up the grumpy thirty-something next door. Clair De Lune seems to be her favorite song, it seems, because she plays it constantly. Sometimes when Levi is awake at night, he hears her playing the melody on the piano. It’s a great song, so soft and somewhat melancholy, and it’s become his favorite too.

The eggs are milky. Not hot anymore. No good. So he throws them away in the trash and sips the rest of his coffee before putting on sweats and heading next door. He has to meet this girl playing the piano. He’s only seen her once--while he was waiting for his car one day, she exited the building hand-in-hand with her father who was as blonde as she was. It was warming sight, and not a lot of sights can warm a heart as steel as his.

He knocks lightly on the door. Footsteps hurriedly head towards the peephole, and hands rush to the lock to unlock it. The door opens to the father, whose name Levi still does not know. “Hi,” he says, eyes crinkling as his lips curl into a smile. “You’re the guy who lives next door, right? Levi Rivaille? I’m Reiner.” His hand is out for Levi to shake, but Levi’s not used to premature contact. He doesn’t shake in the first meeting. It’s awkward and weird to feel another living thing’s hand in yours, but for some reason, he does it anyway.

“Hi, I hear your daughter playing,” Levi says, and Reiner’s eyes immediately go wide.

“Is she bothering you? She has piano practice today, and she really needed to practice before practice so she can get this song down for her piano teacher. I can tell her to stop.” Reiner leans against the door, arms crossing as if he’s trying to intimidate. Levi’s not intimidated, not even Erwin can intimidate him, and everyone’s intimidated by Erwin.

“No,” Levi answers him. “It’s just that I hear her every day and I think it’s beautiful. I wanted to see her play.”

Reiner’s eyes brighten when he hears Levi say that. He immediately invites him in, asking him if he wants coffee and such. Levi accepts, because Reiner’s coffee should be good, unlike the shitty kind he has in his cabinet right now.

Reiner looks very accomplished because there are plaques everywhere with his name on it. Trophies of all sorts are in the trophy cabinet, but they’re not just Reiner’s. Some are for someone named Luna, so he just assumes that his daughter earned them.

Levi is led into the living room, but before he enters, Levi stops and looks at Reiner. “Look, I’m not in the position to give your daughter a record label and make her famous, I hope you know that.”

The blonde man laughs, pats Levi’s back, and says, “I don’t want that life for my daughter, sir, so it’s okay.” Levi supposes that’s true. The famous life kind of sucks, and it’s endless, whether he likes it or not. It’s not exactly a life that is ideal. But he gets money and he does what he loves, so it doesn’t really matter. Fame or not, it’s still going to be fun.

Reiner taps her shoulder, pausing her playing. He places her on his lap. She’s dressed very formally, with the long babydoll dress and long hair adorned with a big bow on the back of her head. Both dress and bow match the color of her light blue eyes. “Sweetheart, this is Levi,” Reiner says, pointing at Levi. He must be a really ominous figure to him. The eyebags don’t help. He looks stressed out and depressed. (Sometimes, how he looks is how he feels. It’s not enjoyable.) “He lives next door and heard you play, so he wanted to see you. Can you play for him while I get us drinks?” She nods, throwing her arms around her Papa’s neck and kissing him on the check.

“I will, Papa.”

“That’s my girl,” he says, kissing her forehead. She climbs down from her Papa’s lap and onto the piano bench to start playing. Reiner looks at Levi. “You can talk to her while I’m off getting coffee. You’ll be seeing a lot of each other in the near future. She’s coming with me on to the tour.”

“You’re going to see us perform?” Levi asks him. Reiner laughs loudly, but Levi’s unsure of why.

“I’m going with you guys. I’m the on-call physician slash undercover personal bodyguard. Erwin’s going to pay me double if we need my doctor services.”

“Oh,” Levi says, and Reiner nods, then heads towards the kitchen. Claire places her fingers on the C-position, plays from the lower octave to the higher, and starts to play. Whizzing around the piano, her fingers go from low to high and to low again, but she stays in rhythm. It’s a slow song, slow but effectively showing the overload of emotions in it. He knows that it’s sentimental; she wouldn’t be playing it constantly if it weren’t, with piano lessons or not.

He coughs, getting her attention. “What’s your name?”

“Claire,” she answers quietly, still continuing to play the piano. She must have been playing since she was four, because no one this small can be this good at anything. He asks her how old she is. “Eight,” she answers.

“She’s a prodigy,” Reiner says quietly from behind them. Levi doesn’t turn around to look at Reiner since the speed of Claire’s flying fingers intrigues him. Carefully holding up the cup of coffee in front of Levi, Reiner sits down on the couch, sipping his own coffee as he stares at his very talented daughter. “She doesn’t talk much. I was thinking it was some sort of development problem, but it just turns out she doesn’t enjoy talking. Playing piano seems to be the only way she can actually communicate.”

“It’s amazing,” Levi answers, sipping his coffee quietly. Yes, this coffee is much better than what he had in his apartment. It has more taste--more like actual coffee rather than beans and hot water stuck together in the same cup. Reiner even put in a little milk and sugar; now Levi knows that he does kind of like the sweetened kind. He used to always get strictly black coffee, really bittersweet, but it jolts energy in his body. This jolts him awake and tastes good, so it’s a win-win.

“Question,” Levi mumbles while sipping his coffee slowly, as if he’s taking the time to remind himself of how good coffee tastes. “Why does she play this song constantly? If she’s what you say she is, surely she knows other songs. I know many prodigies who know more than one song.”

“An ode to her mother, I guess,” Reiner tells Levi, looking at the picture of a blonde woman on the glass coffee table in the center of the room. “Clair de Lune means moonlight in French, and she likes it so much because her mother’s name and her name are in the same title.”

“What’s her mother’s name?” Levi asks him.

“Luna,” Reiner answers. “Her name is Luna. We don’t talk much about her. She’s a pretty sensitive subject.”

“Ah,” Levi says. He doesn’t pry, because prying isn’t nice when people have already given their barriers, and Levi’s not one to cross the line. So he just watches Claire play until he had to leave (which is after Reiner asked him to stay for breakfast. He’s still hungry because milky eggs don’t make great breakfasts.)

 

***

 

When enters the airport, everyone’s already there, even Reiner and Claire. Hanji comes sprinting up to him.

“Levi, look! It’s Jean!” she yells, pulling him by the collar. Jean Kirschtein chokes, his eyes closing, and mouth gaping in order to get at least a little air. “Remember? The roadie I beat last year in that drinking race!” She pinches his cheek before squinting at him. “Has your alcohol toleration level risen? Can you finally try it again?”

“With you, Hanji, never,” he snorts, shaking his head and running his hands through his hair (which was colored an unnatural light brown, Levi knows that it can’t be real. It must be dyed.) “With Eren, maybe. I’ve beat him already. He’s weak.”

“Weak,” Eren exclaims, glaring angrily at Jean. “ _Weak_? Why, I oughta--”

“First, who the _hell_ says ‘why, I oughta’ because I’m pretty sure no one in the twenty-first century actually does,” Connie Springer, the other damn annoying roadie, quips, making Eren glare at him next.

“I think you’re making it worse,” Sasha Braus, their production manager, whispers into Connie’s ear. There’s no doubt those two are dating, because Levi’s caught them making out backstage twice, and all he can think about is _why him_? It’s a reasonable question, because Sasha’s a really strict production manager and everything has to be right when she’s around (she’s even yelled at Jean for bringing in the wrong drinks for Eren, which made Eren’s smug smirk grow even wider); she’s so unlike Connie, who makes everything into a joke and screws with everything he’s not supposed to touch. The only time when those two actually connect is when she goes food crazy. Sasha has the metabolism of a hummingbird, maybe that’s because she runs around the stage constantly, or something else, but Levi doesn’t want to think about it.

Mikasa pulls Eren down just as he’s about to stand up. He looks pissed, like he’s about to knock Jean and Connie out, but Mikasa’s grip is too tight for him to get up. “ _Mikasa_ ,” Eren whines while Jean and Connie snicker. Levi can see from the corner of his eye Annie rolling her eyes discreetly.

Erwin rolls his carry-on to their terminal. “Sorry I’m late,” he mumbles, taking a seat next to Mikasa while rubbing his head. “I forgot to set my alarm.”

“Truly sorry about that sir,” Armin stutters, coming out of nowhere. Levi squints at him, wondering how the hell and when the hell he got here. It’s like he follows Erwin around everywhere. Armin is Erwin’s secretary, not Erwin’s assistant.

“No, no,” Erwin says, waving his hand to show Armin that he’s acknowledging him, but not one hundred percent with him. “It’s my fault. You don’t have to say sorry, _for the hundredth time_.”

Armin turns into a light shade of pink, and Sasha laughs, patting at the empty seat next to her. “Come on, newbie. Connie and I will teach you the ropes.”

Levi looks around at more of the crew down the row. Krista’s reading some sappy romance novel next to her bodyguard girlfriend Ymir, who’s fallen asleep on their main bodyguard Bertholdt, who is trying to softly push her head off his shoulder. Annie’s typing away on her laptop next to the blushing Armin who is next to the chatty Sasha with the unbelievably bald roadie Connie. Jean’s still trying to pick a fight with Eren who is sitting next to Mikasa, her hand gripping Eren’s wrist tightly while her other arm is wrapped around Erwin who is typing something in his phone while lying his head on Mikasa’s. Mike’s right next to Levi and Hanji’s still talking to him about some damn thing he can’t keep up with.

“Alright,” someone says from the end of the row. It’s the captain of the plane, with his hat and gloves on and pearly white teeth shimmering under the equally white light. “Time to go, folks.”

“Marco, is that you?” Jean asks, eyes widened, lips smiling, and arms outstretched. “Oh, God, you literally got your pilot’s license? I thought you were kidding!”

“Nope,” Marco says, laughing a bit before slipping off his gloves and stuffing them into his back pocket. “I was busy, I told you. I knew this pilot’s license would come in handy.”

“I’m so glad you kept up with it, Marco,” Hanji smiles, patting Marco’s back as she steers him to the gate. “I told you we were going to have a world tour. Someday, I told you. And it finally came.”

“So proud, Hanji,” he tells her, patting her back and wrapping his hand around her shoulders. Levi grunts, telling the asleep Mike that it’s time to go, and he stands, pulls his bag, and joins the rest of the group to get into the airplane.

 

***

 

“Hello crew, this is your captain speaking. My name is Captain Bott, the pilot-in-command, and this is my co-pilot Marlo Sand. Say hi, Marlo.”

“Heya, folks, we’ll be leaving in a few minutes. Please stand by for your stewardess to show you how to be safe in the plane. Safety precautions are important!”

“God, when will we take _off_?” Eren asks, fiddling with his jacket’s zipper. He huffs, tosses and turns in his seat and slaps his thighs. “I’m bored. Levi, do something fucking stupid.” Levi rolls his eyes and turns the page of his magazine. Eren’s too fucking antsy, and he doesn’t want to talk to him right now. The plane has a wide variety of drinks that Levi really wants to try before he gets off. The stewardess comes out to show them how to take off their seatbelts, and Eren’s eyes go wide. “Nevermind, let’s not take off. Ever.”

Levi just rolls his eyes again and waits for this whole thing to end.

Turns out, the stewardess has a liking towards Levi and doesn’t really like Eren. “Oh, _god_ ,” she says, grabbing the packet of peanuts for Levi. “I really love singers. The leading men, you know? They’re so powerful. Dominant.” If she’s telling him discreetly that she has a sub kink, he doesn’t really want to hear it. He’s not like that. Eren, on the other hand, is.

“Oh yeah?” he asks, eyes literally shining with interest. “I’m intrigued. Do you like drummers?”

“God, no,” she says with disgust. “They’re like the back-up singers. No one really looks at them.” Eren sinks in his seat while Levi snorts. She hands him a piece of paper (that she pulled out from her bra) and winks at him. “My name’s Hitch. Give me a call when you’ve landed, alright?”

Yeah, _right_. Like he’s ever going to call her. Many girls give him their numbers every day, but he doesn’t actually call them. He’s not in the search for a relationship, because the last one was a huge failure. It doesn’t matter who the girl is--whether she’s the lead singer of a band or the clerk at the Gucci store or the stewardess of their private plane. He’ll always reject, he never accepts, and he’ll never call. It’s been that way since he’s started this life.

Eren mumbles, “Fuck you, you little shit,” before turning to the window bitterly. Levi puts on his headphones and drowns the sounds out.

 

***

 

“Come _on_ , Eren,” Levi says, nudging Eren’s side to get his attention. Eren groans, waves Levi off, and turns towards the window again. Levi huffs, punching Eren’s side, and in return, gets a yelp. “You can’t ignore me just because the stewardess likes me more than you.”

Eren is unresponsive, head still turned away from Levi, hands still stuffed into his sweater’s pockets, and earbuds still in his ears. Levi knows that Eren can still feel his presence next to him. Eren knows that Levi’s talking, it’s just that he doesn’t want to answer. And that is very, _very_ rude.

“You shit,” Levi snaps, ripping the earbuds from his ear. “Talk to me.”

“What the hell was that for?” Eren growls, hand shooting from his pocket and gripping Levi’s wrist tightly. Fuck, that hurts. Eren must be working out a _lot_ because last time he did this, his grip was so loose, Levi was able to get out of it. This time, it’s tight, it’s burning, and it’s about to break his bone. A grunt interrupts their session.

It’s Erwin, eyes glaring at both of them and tongue tsking the roof of his mouth. Mikasa turns around too, only focusing on Eren and his hand with a glare. “ _Behave_ ,” Erwin says lowly, quietly, but the effect is great. Levi’s never been this scared of Erwin.

“Let go, Eren,” Mikasa says simply. Eren shakes his head. His eyes are still trained on Levi’s wrist as if he’s purposed in his heart that he is going to break it. “ _Eren_ ,” Mikasa demands again. Eren sighs heavily with a hint of anger huffing out. He lets go of Levi’s wrist. “Do you want me to call Mom?” she threatens him. A dark shade of black has taken over her eyes, and that usually means that she’s angry (and her eyes only turn black when she’s angry with Eren.) Her eyes carve themselves into angry slits that are ready to strike anyone, even Levi, if he manages to piss her off even more (which is undoubtedly possible.) “Behave, _or else_.”

Eren huffs, puts in his earbuds again, and turns to the window. Levi goes back to the magazine, and once he finds what he’s looking for, he raises his hand up.

Hitch comes by, hand on hip and tongue sticking out of her lips. “What do you need, babe?”

 _Babe_ , fuck, gross. “I need two vodka tonics, please.” He motions her to come closer and whispers into her ear, “And can you cheer up my friend? Eren’s grumpy because you don’t like him. I’ll definitely call you later if you do.” She giggles slightly, winking at him with her left eye. (It looks super unnatural, and he never wants to see that again.)

She goes towards the back of the plane to grab the two vodka tonics for Levi. He looks at Eren who still seems really pissed. God, what did he do _again_? Just because some chick didn’t like him and liked Levi, he just _had_ to get pissed? Eren’s too good for her, and she needs another man who won’t be gone all the time because of touring. Life like this is stressful, and he needs to know that. Of course Levi knew how relationships like that worked. It always ended up crumbling apart.

Hitch gives Levi his vodka tonic and taps Eren’s shoulder to give him his. “Here you go, sweetie. On the house.” She winks at him, and Eren’s face instantly brightens up. When he sees Levi’s cup, he instantly gets pissed again.

“Oh,” he grumbles, sipping his alcohol quietly. “She got you one too.”

“Because I asked for it, dumbass,” Levi says under his breath before bringing the cup to his lips and drinking more. “She got you yours without asking you. Now, can you stop being mad at me?”

Eren looks at him with narrow eyes before laughing and punching him softly. “How can I stay mad at you? You’re like my best friend.”

“Best friend, huh?” Levi asks, eyes slowly trailing to Eren. “I thought I was a pain in the ass to you.”

“And I’m a pain in the ass to you, but despite that, we live with each other,” Eren tells him, smiling slightly. “And you’re not my number one best friend. That’s Mikasa, because she’s my sister and she takes care of my ass every day. Armin’s number two, so maybe that makes you number three. Or four? Because I like Hanji more than you. She’s nicer. But you’re definitely a number higher than Jean. He’s a complete ass. He even looks like a horse. Maybe that makes him a donkey?”

“Fuck, Eren, you talk too much,” Levi mumbles, rolling his neck. Talking to Eren is stressing him out, but it’s fun, nonetheless, so maybe they are best friends. “Let’s just clink our glasses and get this drink overwith. I’m not going to be drunk later.”

“I will,” Eren says, drinking more. He holds up his glass, and Levi brings his up to clink. They push their glasses together, the glass makes a clink, and they start drinking more. After Levi finishes his drink, he gives it to another stewardess while Eren orders a second one.

 

***

 

“Well, New York,” Jean says, stretching his back. The airport is still cold and dreary since it’s still four in the morning. Many passengers are still sitting on seats in the terminal; their eyes are droopy and their stance looks like they’re about to slump out of the chair. Levi's already slipped on his hoodie. Maybe the white button-up was a mistake. At least he was wearing his favorite jeans and sweater, and maybe he didn't need the sunglasses just yet.

"You booked us in the winter?" Levi asks Erwin, who is holding Mikasa's hand as they walk through the airport. Levi's strolling next to them because Eren's off somewhere, probably with Hanji and Mike or Jean and Connie. They're probably already at the bagging station. Jean and Connie are stuck with the job of taking care of all the bags--with them being roadies, it seems that they're stuck with that burden forever. And to think of how many bags each other them brought. Levi brings at least three, Hanji at least four, Mike at least two, and Eren at least three too. Mikasa has six, since the band requires a _lot_ of styling. Erwin has two for clothes and more bags for paperwork. In total, everyone had enough bags to make Jean and Connie rent two separate cars to bring the bags to the hotel.

Erwin nods, arm still curling around Mikasa. "Christmas in New York. What could be better?"

He's right. Snow graces light-adorned rooftops, ice skates are taken out of storage, christmas trees are set up, and for a season, the world is beautiful. Winter’s always been Levi’s favorite season. He can always count on it to be cold. Winter’s for noses to become frozen nubs, fingers to become icicles, and hands to be held. It’s easier to be warmed up in winter, and that’s why he enjoys it so much.

The only problem is that she’s always reminded him of winter. She still wears that grey beanie he gave her last winter; he sees it in the news when she’s walking around towns with her new catch of the week.

He tries to forget about her, but it’s hard to even try.

“Levi?” someone asks, poking his side. He tenses up and looks at the disturber. It’s Mikasa, fingers clutching at the handle of his carry-on.

“Yeah?”

“You kind of froze up,” she mumbles, stuffing her face into that red scarf of hers. She gives him his bag, her fingers graze at his, and it feels weird, really weird, because she’s very cold. “You stopped and dropped your bag for a second. I picked it up for you.”

“Thanks,” he says, nodding at her. They begin to walk again until he realizes that Erwin’s no longer with them. So he asks.

“He’s with Krista and Annie overlooking room assignments,” Mikasa says quietly. She sniffs at the end of her sentence. “You’ll have to excuse me, my health isn’t well.” She sniffs again. Her feet shuffle quietly towards the exit and he follows her out.

He says, “It’s okay,” in a quiet tone. They stand next to each other while the rest of the team grabs their bags. Levi can hear Eren fighting with Jean. “Your brother’s fighting again.”

“I’m sick of him,” she coughs, “fighting with other people. It’s annoying.”

“Indeed it is,” Levi nods. It becomes silent again, because Levi can’t hold a conversation even if his life depends on it. He can hear the sound of teeth clattering, and when he looks at her, he sees her shivering. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” she says in a weak voice. She says it again in a much stronger tone. “Just. Fuck, it’s really cold.”

 _Damn_ , he’s gonna fucking regret this later probably. He takes off his hoodie and _christ_ , it _is_ fucking cold. “Here,” he mumbles, slipping it on her shoulders. “You need it more than I do.”

“I can’t take this, Levi,” she says hoarsely, coughing again. “You’re gonna get sick.”

“You’re already sick, Mikasa, I need you to take it.” He slides the snow around his feet and makes a small pile. There is still snow floating down from above, trying to make its way to the ground. “Really. I’ll be fine. Just for now.”

Mikasa really isn’t one to fight. He’s seen that from the years she’s been working with him, which was since Eren joined the group in earlier days. Eren was still a sophomore, and Mikasa was too, but she had exceptional styling skills for a cosmetology major and Eren had exceptional drumming skills, so it was a deal when the Titans got both of them on board.

She slips on the hoodie to add on a layer to withstand the cold New York weather. Levi only has a sweater as protection. That is certainly not enough because he can feel the temperature dropping to below zero. Finally, Marco drives up to them with a very large tour bus.

“Hi, Mikasa!” he says excitedly after opening the doors. “Look at we have here!”

“Look at all this leather!” she screams (as much as her voice allowed) as her fingers glide on top of the seat. “It’s really nice.”

“Wow,” Eren says from behind them. “Oh, hello Levi. Dear sister Mikasa. I see you had fun--” he actually has the audacity to wink, “--standing next to each other in the freezing cold.”

“Isn’t that romantic?” Hanji muses from behind Eren.

“Indeed, Hanji, very romantic.” The two high five and don’t stop even when Levi sends them a death glare. Mikasa sprawls herself on one of the bunks and stuffs her face into the pillow.

“Okay. Alright. Wake me up when we’re at the hotel,” she mumbles, and slowly drifts off to sleep.

“Did she not sleep?” Hanji asks. Eren shrugs and takes his place on one of the seats. Mike enters the bus (followed by Annie, Krista, and Ymir) when he lays down.

“In the plane, you mean?” Eren asks her. Hanji nods. “She always sleeps. It’s pretty normal for her since it’s hard for her to sleep unless her energy’s low. She gets knocked out after being awake for almost twenty-four hours. Hey Annie, how hot do I look right now?” Annie ignores him and walks directly to the bus’s bathroom. He sighs dreamily. “It’s so hot when she plays hard to get.”

Ymir scoffs when she sits next to him, landing with a big plop. “Usually, when a girl plays hard to get,” she widens her eyes and zooms right next to his face, “it means she wants you to leave her the fuck alone.”

“Ymir, I think you’re scaring him,” Krista says quietly as she heads to the mini fridge. Ymir laughs as she pats the spot next to her.

“I don’t think so, babe. Sit next to me so we can share that sandwich.”

Levi sits next to the scared (and mildly sweating) Eren. Hanji sits right next to him and starts talking about some bassist thing that he understands but doesn’t have the energy to listen to, so instead, she starts talking to Mike about the new chords she’s been working on. Levi interrupts their conversation by asking where Erwin was.

“In Jean’s car, I think,” Hanji answers, “or he has a private car. Of course, we can count on Armin being right next to him, so he’s safe.” Mike laughs as he softly punches Hanji’s arm.

“Hey, cut him some slack,” he says, pulling his phone out from his pocket and punching in the code to unlock it. “Everyone likes Erwin. It’s just that Armin likes Erwin a _lot_. It’s sad that he doesn’t have a chance though, because Erwin’s already so smitten with Mikasa. They’re probably going to get engaged by the end of next year, or at least that’s what I heard from Annie.”

On cue, Annie enters the room and sits next to Mike. “He told me himself,” she says in a nonchalant tone. “We’re going ring shopping soon, I think. This Sunday. Because he wanted to buy it before this year ends. Or were we going to shop for her Christmas present? I forgot.”

“Are you going to buy Mikasa a present, Levi?” Hanji asks, poking his ribs. He winces and slaps her hand; and in response, she laughs. “You know, since you like her and everything.”

“Like her?” Annie asks, a smile forming on her lips. And that’s an interesting thing, Annie smiling, because Annie doesn’t smile (or show any type of emotion but bored for that matter). In addition to that, Annie’s smile isn’t the happy type. It’s more of the evil type, the _I’m so gonna tell Erwin this and you’re going to be kicked out of the band and all of your organs are going to be sold on the black market and your skin is going to be used as a coat for Mikasa_. That kind of smile.

“ _Christ_ , all of you jump into conclusions way too quickly.” He rubs his temples and sighs. “I need a damn drink.” He turns to Hanji who is still smiling way too widely for his comfort. “Why are you still smiling like that, Four Eyes?”

She puffs out her chest and smirks at him. “You didn’t deny it.”

“What the hell?”

“You didn’t deny that you liked her. Whenever we say that you like her, you get all defensive and say stuff like _why do you jump into conclusions?_ or you just change the subject completely, but you don’t ever deny.” She high fives Annie who is staring at him with a smirk etched onto her face. Her face reminds him of Eren’s, back when Eren introduced him to Petra Ral of the Supernovas. Evil and scheming. They _are_ perfect for each other.

Levi huffs, says, “I don’t fucking like her,” and gets up to get a very strong glass of alcohol that is very well-deserved. Everyone is giving him a headache, and drinking is great because alcohol’s the best painkiller.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> much thanks to my love [jessie](http://www.sarcasticstiless.tumblr.com) for beta-ing this chapter at the ungodly hour of three am. this chapter is dedicated to her yeEE. next chapter should be up in two weeks because i am going on a week-long vacation to san fran to visit family. thank you for taking the time to read this chapter and thank you for keeping up with it i am v grateful.


	3. Downtown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mikasa's very good with kids, but Levi's not very good with feelings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alRight another chapter up. thank you for waiting for two weeks for this update. in return, here is a 6k+ chapter. and we finally hit 1k+ hits! thank you so much, and i hope you guys are as excited as i am for this fic. there are going to be big things happening in the future.
> 
> as always, let's thank [jessie](http://sarcasticstiless.tumblr.com/) for beta-ing this chapter. she's my official beta and should be worshiped for her great beta-ing skills.

_December: New York_

 

“This is fucking _sick_ ,” Jean whispers as he pulls the last of the bags into the hotel. He slides them next to the pile of bags the two on-call bellhops have to carry upstairs. Jean gives them an apologetic smile before joining the rest of the crew.

Levi can definitely feel his breath hitch. It’s lodged in his throat because the hotel is certainly one of the most beautiful buildings he’s ever seen. The glass chandelier hanging from the ceiling reminds him of the icicles hanging on the balconies outside; the floors are newly-waxed and very shiny; and the hotel staff looks very put-together. He supposes, though, the best deserves the best. They worked hard to get to their level of fame, and they should be congratulated and rewarded for it. And perhaps, maybe Levi can get rewarded just a tad bit more for working his ass off to get this band to where they are now. He undoubtedly deserves most of the credit (if not all), and he’s sure that no one will fight him on that.

“Do you see that chocolate fountain?” Eren says excitedly, tapping Connie’s shoulder and pointing at the massive four-foot chocolate fountain that is the centerpiece of the dining hall. “ _Christ_ , I can stuff myself tonight.”

“And throw up on stage tomorrow,” Hanji laughs, slapping Eren’s back. Eren winces and rubs the stinging pain Hanji created. “Don’t. You’ll feel bad tomorrow, trust me.”

“Thanks, fitness guru Zoe,” he mumbles, hunching over to reach the small spot on his back. “I can always count on you to literally beat me into shape.”

She winks at him and says, “That’s what we’re for. Right, Mike?” Mike nods in response, still gazing at the grand fountain centered at the middle of the lobby.

They sit and wait as Erwin checks them all in at the front desk with Armin (no surprise there) and Annie by his side. Levi unwittingly sits next to Mikasa, who sits next to Reiner and Claire. Hanji and Eren sit right across from him and give him sly smiles and four thumbs up. He glares at them, and that causes their smile to grow even more.

“What’s your name?” he hears Mikasa say from right next to him. He turns to see her looking at Claire who starts to hide behind her father’s neck.

Reiner laughs, nudges the little girl, and says, “Come on, sweets. Don’t be disrespectful. You’re going to have to introduce yourself to everyone sooner or later.” Despite her father’s coaxing, Claire doesn’t come out of her spot behind Reiner’s neck. He really wasn’t kidding when he said that she was shy. “Sweetheart, please,” he tries again, prying her hands off him. He sits her at his lap and makes her face him. “Claire, you’re going to have to talk. Just introduce yourself. It’s not hard to make friends.”

Claire sniffs and hiccups before facing Mikasa. “My name is Claire,” she whispers behind teary eyes. It really must be hard to talk for her. Mikasa sees, so she grabs Claire’s hands, and rubs them.

“Hey,” she says quietly, looking at Claire’s eyes. Mikasa wipes the tears running down Claire’s face, and somehow, that manages to soothe her. “It’s a big step to talk to people when you haven’t before. I’m glad you talked to me.” Claire nods, sniffing more. “When your Papa’s busy, we’re all going to have to take care of you, but don’t be worried. We’re all very nice, I promise. We don’t bite.” Mikasa smiles, and in return, Claire gives a smile too. “It’s okay to cry when you’re scared. I get it. I do too. But in order to get over your fears, you have to make friends so they can fight the fear with you. Am I right?”

“Right,” Claire replies, a bigger smile forming on her face.

“So, do you want to go to the fountain with me? Or do I have to go alone?”

Claire shakes her head, dries her eyes, and gets off Reiner’s lap. She takes Mikasa’s hand, and together, they walk towards the fountain.

“She’s really nice,” Reiner says, still looking at his daughter. Mikasa gives Claire a coin, and after getting into Mikasa’s arms, she throws it into the fountain. Claire laughs, claps, and hugs Mikasa’s neck, snuggling her head into it. “I’ve never seen Claire warm up to somebody that quickly. The only one that managed to bring that side of Claire out is Luna.” Reiner pauses. The subject of his wife always seems to get him preoccupied; it even looks like his mind trails somewhere else. Levi notices it. Shaking his head gets him out of his trance. “It’s just. It’s really nice to see Claire open up again.”

Levi nods and answers. “I’ve known Mikasa for years. I’ve seen her do the same thing with many other kids that aren’t quite as social as their peers. They really seem to open up to her.”

Reiner hums in response. He quickly turns his head towards Levi. “What’s your history with her? Is she your girlfriend or something? You two seem very close.”

He decides to play it cool since he can feel a burning sensation rising in his cheeks. (He doesn’t even know why it’s there, because he _doesn’t fucking like her_.) To keep up with his smooth persona, he laughs quietly and says, “No, she’s just our stylist, and I would like to say she’s my friend, but I’m not sure where we stand.” He wonders why he’s being so open with Reiner; in normal cases, he isn’t. Maybe it’s because Reiner looks very easy to talk to. But he doesn’t really open up too easy to talk to people. He learned that lesson a long time ago. “We’ve been acquaintances for a long time. I just notice her now and then. Why do you ask?”

“When you came to sit here, your arm was kinda wrapped around her. Not like on her, but on the chair. See, you’re doing it right now.” Levi looks at his right arm, and it is indeed in that position. What is this, some corny teen 90s flick? _Christ_.

“I do that all the time,” he says, trying to cover up the fact that he, in fact, _doesn’t_ do it all the time. Levi’s just a shit liar now. He can hear Hanji and Eren snickering from across them, so he says in a dark tone, “Oi. What are you shits laughing about?”

“He’s _lying_ , Reiner!” Hanji says, cupping hands around her mouth to project her voice. “Totally lying! He’s such a fucking liar, isn’t he, Eren?”

“Totally,” Eren agrees, snorting at Levi. Levi’s eyes flare, he snarls at them aggressively, and they jump, backing down.

“Watch out,” Connie whispers to Hanji, breaking away from his makeout session with Sasha, “he’s turning animal.”

“Go to hell,” Levi glares at him. “I’ll shave your head off.”

“Can’t shave it if it already is!” he sings and returns to Sasha, who is giggling quietly beside him. _Tch_ , that kid is disgusting. Not only does he have a shaved head and a secret tattoo on his ass (which he got when he was stoned _and_ drunk), he even has a fake gold grill for his alter ego _C-Sizzle_. If the expression _what the_ _fuck_ was a person, it’d definitely be Connie.

Erwin approaches them with keys and paperwork in hand. “Okay,” he says. The jazz music in the room is slightly overpowering his voice, but Levi sees that he doesn’t mind because his left foot is tapping the floor with the beat. “Annie, you’ve got the room assignments.”

Annie nods and pulls out her iPad. “Mr. Smith will get his own room for this city, so that means the rest of us will have roommates. As you requested, Reiner, you and Claire will get your own room. King-sized bed, I hope that’s enough for you two.”

“More than enough,” Reiner says, nodding at her. Annie’s lips twitch into a smile for some reason, which is, again, very, very _odd_. Levi snorts, resulting in Annie shooting him a glare.

“Connie and Jean share a room."

"Hell yeah!" Connie shouts, high-fiving Jean. Shaking his head, Jean clicks in sync with the music.

"We're bringing out the beer tonight, baby!"

"You're also going to have Marco and Armin in your room, so be respectful," Annie adds, giving them the evil smile. Connie's mouth instantly gapes at her and Jean groans.

"Armin and Marco? Can't they get their own room?" Jean asks in a very whiny voice. Annie's lips purse as her eyes narrow at them.

"We can't trust you to have your own room anymore," she says simply, tapping at her iPad. "After you trashed the last hotel and we were forced to check-out at three in the morning, we're never letting you two be roommates again. At least two responsible male chaperones to make sure the room is in order are to be there when you two have to be roommates. If we're in the city, you can do whatever the hell you want."

Connie snorts and slips his arm around Sasha. "Hey, that was fun. You almost killed me, Annie, and it was fun running from you, but you can't stop us from bringing beer in our room. That's our holy grail."

"No, I suppose not. It would help us a lot, though." Annie rolls her eyes before continuing. "Bertholdt, you're going to be alone also, because your room is right next to theirs."

"That's fine," he says, nodding his head before continuing to scroll on his phone.

"Levi and Eren are going to be sharing a room as well as Hanji and Mike." Levi and Eren collectively groan as Mike and Hanji high-five each other enthusiastically.

"Annie, you've got to be fucking _kidding_ me," Eren mumbles. "I'm stuck with neat freak?"

"No Eren, I don't believe I fucking _kid_ ," she says in a serious tone.

Levi snorts and tells him, "Kid, if it wasn't for me, you would be stuck with horseface and baldy, so shut up and suck it up."

" _Horseface_ ," Jean says in an disbelieving tone. Connie does the same with _baldy_. It seems that eye-rolling is the norm for Annie, because she does it every five seconds, but Levi supposes that if he's stuck to work for a bunch of idiots, he would too. All the younger people in this crew are pains in the ass. They're like canker sores you can't get rid of. Canker sores hurt like hell.

Annie takes a deep sigh before continuing to list roommates. "Ymir and Krista will be sharing a room."

"We're _so_ gonna have sex to- _night_!" Ymir yells, pumping her fist in the air, and gasps from horrified mothers could be heard from miles away. She chuckles, settling in her seat with her arm wrapping around Krista's shoulders. "Ah, works every time."

"No, but seriously, Ymir, you have to quiet down," Annie informs her in a monotone voice with her fingers still tapping on her iPad. "I don't want another call from management because two of our crew members are moaning too loudly."

Krista turns into a bright shade of crimson, and Hanji, Eren, and Connie burst out laughing. Hanji is especially amused, because she drops on the ground with her hands clenching her stomach. "God," she wheezes, grabbing Eren's arm to help her up, "classic!"

" _Anyways_ ," Annie says with an exasperated sigh, "Mikasa and I will room with Sasha. Armin has the keys so get those from him. Bellboys should be bringing our bags up now. We will have a meeting in Conference Room B after eating lunch at the hotel restaurant at exactly twelve o' clock. _Don't be fucking late_." She glares at Eren, Connie, and Jean who laugh nervously while waving timidly at her.

They all stand up and head to Armin to get their hotel key. Eren heads up with Connie and Jean, and Levi decides to stay back. He'd rather be stuck with Hanji in an elevator than them, because last time he took an elevator ride with them, his shirt ended up stained with Greek yogurt. That was unpleasant.

While waiting for the elevator to come down, Hanji squeezes next to him and peers over his shoulder. "What room do you have?" she asks in a peppy tone. He winces, because it's way too early to be _that_ excited. Granted, he's never excited at all, but damn. Even he knows that Hanji's enthusiasm is unnatural.

"567," he answers, giving her his key. She laughs, hands his key back, and pats his back.

"Get ready for hell! We're neighbors!"

Taking in a deep breath, Levi rubs his temples and decides the only remedy for his growing migraine is alcohol, or maybe two tablets of Advil. Whichever he finds first.

 

***

 

He knocks at the door and waits for a response. Tiny footsteps race towards him, and he can hear a muffled _someone's here!_ He knows it's Claire; Claire's the only kid who's actually touring with them, but he doesn't expect her to be in this room.

Mikasa opens the door with Claire hiding behind her skirt. He can see Sasha laughing condescendingly at Annie, who then gets smacked in the face with a pile of cards Sasha threw at her. He doesn't know what the hell is happening, but he knows Annie is going through Braus's hell. "Boo- _yah!_ Beat you! _Finally!_ " Sasha screams, jumping on the bed and pointing at Annie, laughing hysterically.

 _Ah_ , yes. He sees why her and Springer make such a great couple.

"Calm the fuck down, it's just Go Fish," Annie grumbles. Mikasa quickly turns around, shoots her a glare, and puts one finger to her lips while making a _SH_ sound.

"There's a kid here, Annie, and I'm sure you're fully aware of that."

"Sorry, Claire, don't listen to Aunt Annie, she's a bad influence," Annie yells out to Claire who is covering her ears with her hands. She giggles, cheeks tinted pink, at Levi and runs back to Sasha, who pulls her up to the bed and tickles her.

Mikasa turns back to him and smiles. "Hey, is there anything you need?" Levi finally brings himself to knock at her door, he is finally standing right in front of her, and for once, he doesn't know what to fucking _say_. He forgets what he was going to ask her in the first place, which is very unusual.

He hears a crash from his room and immediately, his mind clears up and he remembers what he needs. "Advil. Or any type of aspirin you have. Your brother is giving me one hell of a headache."

Annie joins Mikasa at the front door, but Sasha stays at the bed because she's blowing on Claire's stomach. _Is that how you play with kids these days?_ he asks himself. Certainly, he asks the real questions around here. "Ah, Shorty McShort is here to grace us with his presence," she says while smirking at him. He glares at her with full intensity and reminds himself to rethink why he treats her like she's his friend. "What can our dear goddess of a friend do for you? You're not here for the growth serum, right? We gave that to Erwin, you're too late to gain her love."

"Annie, shut up," he growls, and Annie laughs in response and skips back to the bed to play with Claire. Mikasa shakes her head.

"Don't mind her, she's just trying to mess with your head," she says. "What did you need again?"

"Aspirin," he answers.

"Aspirin," she repeats, opening the door to let him in. "Um. I think I put it somewhere here, but I can't remember." She enters the bathroom as Levi waits patiently (and awkwardly) outside of their room. He can hear her rustling through her bags and even her makeup case. After a few minutes pass, she sticks her head out of the bathroom and looks at him weirdly. "You can come in, you know. Didn't I ask you to come in?"

"No," he tells her. "At least, I don't recall." Of course he fucking recalled, he just doesn't want to seem disrespectful. _And_ , maybe the fact that Annie and Sasha are in the room have something to do with it. They're frightening human beings, more frightening than he is sometimes. And the fact that _that_ is even _possible_ scares him.

"Hm, God, my mind seems to be all over the place today," she says, wandering back inside the bathroom. "Come in. Play with Claire. She hasn't warmed up to you yet."

He steps into the room with caution, because Annie and Sasha can attack any minute. The moment he steps into their territory, he swears their eyes glaze and they lock their sights on him as if he is their next target. He's not going to lie, it's scary, but he believes that Erwin picked them to be in the team for that very reason. All of them are deadly productive females. They're the complete opposites of the guys. The only guys that do actual work for Erwin are Armin, Bertholdt, Marco, and Reiner. Connie and Jean are just muscle, really. Servants. It's fitting.

"Ah, Levi," Annie drawls, lips curling at the ends to make the most ominous smile, "join us." Sasha's ears perk up (and it's the most weirdest thing, Sasha's ears can actually _move_ ) and her head twists to look at Levi with her mouth looking exactly like Annie's.

"Long time no see, Rivaille," she says, laughing intensely. Levi tries to back away, but their sights are already locked on him, and he knows from experience they're not going to let him go easily.

"Claire, that's Levi," Annie says, eyes narrowing with the same creepy smile plastered on her face. She points at him with a shaky finger. Claire's the only sane person in this room. She smiles widely at him and gets off the bed, running towards him. Quiet enough so that Claire doesn't hear but loud enough so that Levi can, Annie whispers (it isn’t really a whisper because it’s so _loud_ ) into Sasha's ear, "Also known as public enemy number one."

Sasha squints, laughs nervously, and smiles creepily at him. "Great timing, Levi. We were about to play another round of Go Fish. Would you like to join?" Claire claws at him, like she is asking to carry her. Weird way to ask, but Levi complies, lifting her up in his arms.

"I came here for medicine, Braus, not your creepy games. Why do you do that anyways? It's weird, you know, those faces you two are making." He shivers, blinking twice before looking at them again. They loosen up and give him actual smiles.

"It's fun to creep you out," Annie explains, eyes concentrating on the deck she's shuffling. "With Connie, it's useless because he always screams when we start. Eren, he gets all googly-eyed and that turns me off so I just stop. Armin's gay and he's actually intelligent, so I can't do it with him. You aim for the straight, dumb boys."

"Wait, Jean's straight? What?" Sasha asks. She squints at Annie this time. "I thought he was with Marco."

"He hasn't officially said anything yet," Annie points out, dealing out cards for the two of them. She makes an extra deck for Claire and looks at Levi once she finished it. "You in?"

"No, I'm here for aspirin," he answers. She nods.

"I thought he was straight," she says, turning to Sasha. "He flirts with Mikasa _constantly_ anyways."

"He flirts with Marco too," Sasha informs her.

"So he's bi?"

"Seems like it." They high-five. "Another case solved by the Braus-Leonhardt duo!" Sasha exclaims, making crowd noises with her mouth. "Yeah! Go us!"

Something clicks in Levi mind to cause a delayed reaction. "Wait, did you just call me _dumb_ , Leonhardt?" Annie snorts and focuses on her deck while Claire climbs down from Levi and takes her spot on the bed next to Sasha. 

"You're so late, Ravioli." Sasha laughs and high-fives Annie again while Levi groans. _Ravioli_ , that was the longest-running joke on the last tour they had. Some waiter called Levi _Mr. Ravioli_  at a restaurant one time they were sitting down to have an actual dinner before a concert, and everyone (including Erwin) laughed so hard they had to be kicked out. Levi found out two things: (1) they were all suckers for jokes, and (2) their crew had a knack for getting kicked out.

"I despise that name," he mumbles as they laugh even harder. Claire puts down all of her cards and wins the game of Go Fish they are playing. Annie and Sasha then start to grumble about how that isn't _fair_.

Finally, Mikasa enters after what seemed to be an eternity with a bottle of Advil in her right hand. "Got you covered," she says, handing him the bottle.

"I'll be off now," he says, saluting them; they salute back, but the trio focuses more on the new game of Go Fish to make sure none of the cards are rigged. He's thankful that he got the painkillers first, because too much alcohol will make him drunk.

And so he ends up with the Advil first.

 

***

 

Levi is faultless, though, when it comes to the receiving of alcohol. He only stumbles in rooms to find bottles of beer already prepped for his consumption. Sometimes he gets the good stuff, like '84 wine Erwin sometimes orders when he gets stressed. Normally Erwin doesn't drink (he only drinks with Mikasa, when the late nights get him), but there are certain times (like when Mikasa is in his room) where he can make an exception.

This time, it's Jean's fault for his second cup of alcohol today. He hands Levi a bottle of beer when he comes stumbling in with the bottle of painkillers in hand. "I think this makes me an alcoholic," he slurs, swinging the bottle around, making the liquid swish. He laughs, groans, and falls onto Levi's bed. An open bottle of low quality beer falls onto the bed and spills onto the sheets.

“ _Jean_ ,” Eren grumbles, kicking the bottle off the bed, and the bottle resumes to spill its contents onto the floor. Levi’s honestly too exhausted and too angry to kick both of their asses, so he just grabs the phone and dials the maid service’s number angrily.

“ _This is Rico speaking,_ ” the voice from the other line says. “ _Name, room number, and case, please_.”

“This is Levi Rivaille from Suite 567, I’m going to need a maid to clean up here.” He glares at Eren and Jean who laugh quietly at themselves. _Alcoholics they say_. They have no idea.

“ _A maid will be there shortly, Mr. Rivaille. Have a great day._ ”

The line drops before he can hang up. He looks at the phone almost disgustedly before hanging up. Jean laughs before dropping his head onto Eren’s lap. “Maids,” he chuckles, before finishing his second bottle. “Nice.”

“You’re fucking drunk, Jean,” Levi says angrily, pulling his body towards the edge of the bed. Jean hits his head on Eren’s foot and groans painfully. “Stop drinking, god damn it, and clean your act up or you’ll never get a girlfriend.”

“I don’t want a girlfriend,” he slurs. And so, Sasha is proven right. “I don’t want anyone but alcohol.”

“Sober the hell up,” Levi mumbles while slapping his face. “We have to eat lunch still, and you know that Annie will kill you if you don’t sober up.”

Connie emerges from the bathroom, sober and alcohol-free. Levi, for the first time in his life, looks surprised. The bald roadie stares at the two giggling on Levi’s bed. “I just left to take a shit.”

“I see that,” Levi says, nodding at him. “Well, get Jean to his room. Sober him up before we have to meet downstairs, which is,” he checks his clock, “in an hour, so he should be a bit sober when we go downstairs. I don’t want him shitfaced, okay?”

Connie salutes him and grabs Jean’s arm roughly, pulling him towards the door. “Sorry about the mess, Levi,” he says. _Finally_ , Connie’s actually respectful for once. He pulls Jean out the door, and Levi’s left with a very drunk Eren and an alcohol-drenched bed.

Eren laughs. “I kinda love Jean sometimes, but only when he isn’t being a shithead.”

“I thought you loved Annie,” Levi mumbles, taking off Eren’s stained shirt. Levi also takes off the sheets and soaks up the beer on the carpet.

“I do,” Eren, still very drunk, slurs. “I love everyone.”

“Thanks, Eren,” Levi says. He hears a knock at the door. Before opening it, he leads Eren into the bathroom so he can give him a bath before going downstairs to eat. When he opens the door, the maid winces, sniffing in the putrid smell of beer. “Do you have a carpet cleaner?” he asks her in a demanding tone. She nods once. “When I’m finished cleaning up this kid, I’d appreciate it if the room smells less of alcohol and more of pine or something. Any Febreze you have will do.” She nods once again. “I’d really appreciate it if you clean up the room across from us also, because one of the men there might have thrown up by now.” She nods a final nod and heads into the room, plugging in the carpet cleaner to the wall and heading towards the huge stain on the floor. Levi heads into the bathroom to force Eren to throw up and clean him up.

 

***

 

Jean smells of very strong cologne. Levi’s going to give the credit for that to Connie, because he’s smart enough to use the strongest cologne Jean owns to mask the strong smell of alcohol in order to not piss Annie off. It looks, though, that Jean’s taken a shower, like Eren has. Though not completely sober, their alcohol content level should be legal, so Levi’s going to take it.

Connie sits next to Sasha, of course. Beside them are Reiner and Claire, and beside Reiner is Annie. Annie’s always beside Erwin. To the right of Erwin is Mikasa (Armin sulked a lot because of that), and right beside Mikasa is Eren. Beside Eren is Levi, beside Levi is Hanji, beside Hanji is Mike. Like it always is. Krista, Ymir, Bertholdt, Marco, Jean, and Armin sit at the other end of the table.

Levi can hear Connie laugh. Everyone in the restaurant can hear Connie laugh, it’s been proven. Connie’s laugh is the loudest laugh; it can literally shake whole buildings. One time, Connie laughed so hard, he made Eren roll off his bed. And Eren was sleeping on a different bed from his. Connie’s superpower is truly amazing.

“So, Levi,” Erwin says after completely chewing his smoked salmon, “we’re going to check out the venue. It’s supposed to be really big.”

Levi quietly laughs as he slices up his steak. “Of course it’s going to be huge, Erwin. I don’t expect any less from you.” He stabs one of the sliced pieces of the steak and stuffs it in his mouth. “Go big or go home, right? You always get the best for us.”

Erwin nods and smiles at no one in particular. Maybe at himself, because he’s proud. Levi supposes he’d be proud too if he were Erwin. He’s got a great job, a great team, and a great life.

“Can we eat faster?” Eren groans, playing with his mashed potatoes. “I’m done.”

“Behave,” Mikasa says simply. The rest of lunch goes by quickly.

 

***

 

Sasha’s already at the venue when they get there. As usual, she’s shouting at everyone through her earpiece. She already has the roadies off to work. Everyone is working, it seems, except for the band, because they don’t go on until tomorrow.

“Jean, are you even _listening_?” she yells at him. He’s trying to lift up a speaker, but her screams make him stop and drop it unexpectedly. “ _Jean_. Seriously. I have told you once and I am not telling you again! Don’t ever lift the speakers without any help! You’ll break your back or something.” She touches her earpiece again. “Marco, I need you to come here and help Jean. I think he’s not entirely sober because he won’t _listen to me_.” It looks like her hand is pressuring her earpiece too much. The earpiece looks just about to break. “No, Marco. I don’t care that you’re at the soundboard, I need you here. _Now_.”

Mikasa’s already at the makeup stations, setting up all of her equipment. Her assistants are flying everywhere, placing everything in their designated places. Maybe they’re avoiding Mikasa’s anger, because they know that her anger is much worse than Sasha’s. And Sasha is terrifying when she’s angry. Levi knows.

Of course, no one is more terrifying than Annie, but Annie doesn’t work backstage. Annie’s a publicist now, not a secretary, which makes her more threatening.

While everyone is setting everything up for the big day tomorrow, Erwin and Annie are cruising the band around to show them who is where. Levi’s head is spinning still, probably a result of the alcohol he had during lunch. It’s reasonable though, since everyone is rushing around everywhere. “Okay,” Erwin says, gripping an iPad in his right hand. It’s the setlist for the tour, Levi sees. A mix of songs from their old album and new album are on it. “After every half of these songs are finished, you guys _have_ to go backstage to get changed. All of you have a personal stylist, each are hand picked by Mikasa herself. Eren, meet Mina. She’s your personal stylist.” A small girl with black hair waves shyly at Eren. He smiles at her in response. Erwin puts his arm on Hanji’s shoulder and points to a man with weird sandy blonde hair. “Hanji, this is Auruo. He’s your personal stylist.”

Hanji snorts and immediately rushes up to him. She sniffs his hair. “You’re quite the spritzer, aren’t you, friend? You like Armani cologne?”

His eyes widen, horror-stricken for some reason. Eren laughs loudly (way too loudly) and says, “You’re freaking him out, Hanji.”

“Anyways,” Erwin interrupts, quite amused at Hanji and Auruo’s reaction to Hanji. “Mike, this is Hannah. She’ll take care of you. And Levi, Mikasa’s going to style you herself.”

Hanji claps slowly from next to Auruo who still seems very freaked out by her. “Mikasa, eh?” Her lips curl at the ends, and Levi glares at her intensely. “I wonder why she picked to style him only. I _wonder_.” She drags her words out slowly, causing Erwin to give her a strange look. Levi’s glare intensifies even more.

Mike laughs and says, “So, Erwin, moving on.” He pushes Erwin towards the other stations, and Eren follows them willingly. The stylists go to their stations, leaving Hanji and Levi alone.

Hanji tags next to Levi as they walk slowly behind Erwin. “Seems like a nice guy, that Auruo,” she says, trying to make small talk with a steamed Levi. “He smells too strongly though. I like that. Means that he cares a lot about styling.”

“Didn’t have to say those things in front of Erwin, you fuck,” Levi grumbles, stuffing his hands into his pockets and looking down at the ground.

“So you do have some sort of feelings?” Hanji asks. Her eyebrow shoots up, and her mouth twitches into a smirk. Levi bumps into her before walking faster to where the rest of the band is. That’s when Erwin motions to their dressing rooms and informs them that they will no longer be doing anything for the rest of the day.

Completely dismissing her, Levi walks into his dressing room, leaving Hanji to stand there with a huge smirk plastered onto her face.

 

***

 

Mikasa smooths out the wrinkles on Levi’s dark grey suit. She spritzes a little bit of cologne before stepping back and looking at the finished look. Humming, she says, “Yeah, you’re ready to go.”

“What?” Levi asks, a playful smile on his face. “No good luck kiss? Hug? You’ve got to give me something to wish me good luck. It’s our first concert of the whole tour.” His tone changes from playful to sentimental. When people tell him that he’s going soft, it’s definitely true, especially when it comes to Mikasa. He can’t seem to be a jerk to her. (Eren says that’s _unfair. How can Levi be nice to her but not to him?_ Levi shrugs him off all the time.) “You always wish me luck. It’s been like that from the start. You can’t change tradition just because the person’s changed.”

Mikasa laughs a little before patting his back. “Good luck. That’s all you’re gonna get.”

“Fine,” he grumbles. She laughs again, then turns back to her station to get ready for the next outfit change. Levi reaches the door, but he pauses, feet stuck to the floor. “Hey,” he says, still facing the door, hand still grabbing the doorknob. “Reiner, yesterday, he asked what we were. I told him that we might be friends. Are we friends?”

He can hear her put down a bottle before answering. “Yeah,” her tone is soft, fragile almost. “I guess we are.”

He nods (although he knows she can’t see it) and exits to go to the stage.

 

***

 

The crowd is exhilarating. So many people are out here to see him, and that reminds him of how lucky he really is. “Hello, New York!” With just the sound of his voice, he can conduct a whole orchestra. The only difference between an orchestra and a crowd is that voices are the instruments, but the sound is still equally beautiful. “We are so glad we are here. Thank you for having us!”

“Your city is very beautiful!” Hanji yells out into her microphone. More screams erupt with a few _I love yous_ mixed in with loud cheering. “Isn’t it, Mike?”

“Yes, totally,” he says, and the so-called Mike girls cry out even more. “What do you think of it, Eren?”

“I would live here, if I could,” Eren says into his microphone. The whole crowd jolts up and thousands of girls scream even harder. A small chuckle escapes from his mouth. “Ready, Levi?"

Levi rolls his neck and shoulders, and more girls scream out for him. It seems like with everything they do, girls scream, even if all they’re doing is moving a body part. “Let’s start, New York! This song is called _Wake Up, Let’s Face The World_.”

The crowd is extra loud when Hanji starts strumming. Levi can hear their screams, but once all of them start playing their instruments, the whole arena becomes totally defening. And that is how Levi wants it to be.

It’s powerful. It’s what he loves to do. He knows that even if he wanted to, he can never, ever stop.

 

***

 

The next day, Levi sits at the breakfast nook in his room alone. Eren’s cooking with Sasha in the kitchen; Jean, Connie, and Marco are sitting at the island, waiting for their plates of bacon and eggs; Mikasa’s sitting with Claire at the entertainment area, with the TV playing some cartoon Levi doesn’t recognize. Erwin and the bodyguards must be out with Krista, Armin, and Annie, because they haven’t shown up for breakfast yet. Sasha should really be with them though, so they might not be at the venue, overseeing cleanup.

“Food’s ready!” Sasha yells out, and it seems that everyone’s huddling around her, waiting for their plates. The boys are especially huddling around her, and it looks like Sasha’s getting pissed. “Let Claire get her food first, guys. Be respectful.” Levi can hear Connie muttering something, and it’s undoubtedly something inappropriate for Claire’s ears, so Levi’s glad that no one can understand Connie’s muttering.

Levi’s eyes don’t stray from his iPad. The news is more important than food, and he’s decided that it’s better to wait for everyone to get their food so he doesn’t have to be stuck waiting in a line with Jean, Connie, and the likes. However, an unexpected plate shows up in front of him. He looks up to see Annie sliding in the empty spot next to him.

“Oh,” he mumbles, and Annie scoffs, offended.

“No ‘ _thank you_ '?” she asks him. “I know you’re better than that. You have better manners than Springer, but right now, that’s not showing.”

He rolls his eyes and says, “Fine. Thank you, Leonhardt. Now, what do you want?”

“Hm, nothing,” she answers, cutting into her own set of sausages. “Just wanted to let you know that we just bought the ring. Tiffany’s. Really nice. You can do better.”

“What?” he asks her, head snapping towards her direction. “What are you talking about?”

“You like Mikasa, don’t you?” She pops the sausage into her mouth before looking at him. Her face still looks indifferent, but her eyes look sort of _worried_. Levi doesn’t know why. “I’m just telling you that Erwin and I went ring shopping today. An _engagement_ ring. A Tiffany’s ring. And it’s fucking _huge_.”

“I don’t see why I need to know that,” he says, looking back down at his iPad. He takes a sip out of his coffee cup, a very slow sip, just so the hot coffee can burn his throat.

She shrugs and continues to eat her food. “Just thought you needed to know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another summary of this chapter is: sasha and annie are part of the homo detection squad, connie is an underground rapper, and everyone fucking salutes for some reason. oh, and levi likes very hot coffee.


	4. Beginnings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi sees her again, and it's not pleasant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here is an overdue update. i am sosososo sorry that this is so late because there's been a ton of problems and both my beta and i needed to take a break for a bit. high school isn't as enjoyable as i thought it'd be. but anyways, we're back and ready to update this fic. i have to talk about updates though because those are going to take a _long_ time since i've started freshman year and i'm going to need a ton of a's and my beta jessie is also starting her school. depending on how fast we can do it, updates will be from every two to three weeks maybe. definitely not a month. thank you for waiting so long!

_January: Philadelphia_

 

They spend New Year's at Erwin's suite. It's quite crowded in the room because everyone's piss drunk and taking up all of the space. Every corner of the suite is taken up: corner one is occupied by Connie and Sasha who are too busy with themselves to notice anyone else; corner number two has Eren, Jean, Marco, and Armin, and all four are laughing very hard; corner three has Annie and Reiner who are talking to each other subtly and quietly, almost professionally, but Levi swears he can see a tinge of pink on Annie's cheeks; corner four has Krista and Ymir, both are sipping their alcohol silently and slowly while their eyes target everyone's in the room. Levi's caught Krista's eye more than once. She manages a slight smile as acknowledgement, but Levi instantly looks away to avoid Ymir's scrutiny. Bertholdt is manning the bar (because before he was a bodyguard, he was a bartender; truly, Bertholdt is a man of many talents), and Erwin is sitting on the couch with Hanji and Mike, watching the New Year's performances on Times Square, probably planning to book the Titans for a performance next year.

The only person not present is Mikasa, and that's odd because he saw her getting a bottle of beer just half an hour ago. She couldn't just have disappeared. And so, Levi investigates.

He knocks on the bathroom door but finds that no one is there. The only other rooms in the suite are an office and a bedroom. It's unlikely that Mikasa would have any business in Erwin's makeshift office so he heads towards the bedroom.

He does find Mikasa in the bedroom, but she's accompanied with Claire sleeping right next to her. She's stroking Claire’s hair while her other hand is flipping channels with the remote. Pushing the door slowly, Levi enters the room and shuts the door softly in the process.

"What are you doing in here?" he asks her in a soft tone. He doesn't want to wake Claire, because that would cause more problems for Reiner. It seems that he's having fun right now (with Annie, who knew she could entertain with that bored expression of hers), and Levi doesn't want to take that away from it. Someone like Reiner probably doesn't have time to have fun. Being a single parent is a full-time job, Levi knows that. Not that he's got any first-hand experience; he's just learned a thing or two from his mother.

Mikasa's eyes flicker to him. Her fingers stop pressing the channel buttons, and the TV stops on the New Year's Eve broadcast. She gives him a soft smile. Her fingers never stop weaving through Claire's hair. "It's so loud outside," she whispers. "I didn't want Claire to wake, so I decided to lay next to her, just to keep her company in case she wakes up. Reiner needs to relax himself. He always looks so tense."

That bit is true. Even Levi notices it. Reiner's neck veins always look like they're ready to pop. His veins are equivalent to both Sasha's and Levi's _combined_ , and that's terrifying. Poor Reiner. He needs to have some free time. Of course, the single dad job never stops, even more now that Claire's become more outgoing. It's good for Reiner that the staff is ready to take care of Claire when he's busy.

Levi nods, folds his arms together, and just stands there. His eyes are on the television.

And _of course_ , she's on it.

"We're here with the Supernova's lead singer, Petra Ral," the caffeinated reporter chirped. "As always, your performances are energetic and lively. To get us pumped up for the new year, I presume."

"Yes, I guess your presumptions are correct," Petra chuckles and adds, "as always, Isabel."

The reporter's smile widens even more after hearing that comment. She clears her throat and asks, "Surely, this year's been huge for you--new album, new tour, and new boyfriend, but the nation and the staff at E! want to know, what about the old? Are you still in contact with ex-boyfriend Levi Rivaille of the Titans? And how is your relationship now, since it was severed a couple years ago by that tragic break up?" Levi stiffens in his spot, feet glued to the floor and eyes glued to the screen, but it seems that he's still willing to wait for Petra's answer. She, too, looks stiff, and her mouth is forming a fake smile. It looks like the reporter's smile is challenging Petra. How evil.

"Uh," Petra starts. _Uh-oh, that's not good_. He knows that's not good. _Uh_ is how she starts every awkward conversation, and he knows that well because he's always been at the brunt of the _uhs_ , at least back when they were considered a _thing_. "Yeah," she continues, and Levi knows this interview is already going downhill, "Levi and I are not communicating as much as I'd like for us to be, but you know. That's life. And we ended on good terms, so we're still friends."

 _Friends_. That's what she thinks they are. Of course, Levi has to take consideration of the circumstances she's in. She has to say that or else her agent will kill her. But it's not like her answers matter anyway. Frankly, Levi doesn't care whatever their relationship is. He knows for sure that they’re not friends. They're not anything. He's perfectly fine with them being just strangers. It's better that way.

"Do you want me to change the channel?" Mikasa asks from behind him. His eyes stop glaring at the screen and flicker to the floor. Anger, maybe that's what he feels, but he's unsure about that. Somewhere deep in his heart, there's always going to he a soft spot for Petra, even if he knows that he's never going to have a spot in her's. He's fucking pathetic, _he knows_ , but it's better to have loved and lost than to have not loved at all.

"No," he mumbles, jamming clenched fists into his jean pockets. Softening his jaw, he approaches the chair near Mikasa and sits down, sinking himself into the velvety cushions. "I don't have any problems with her. We can keep watching."

Mikasa nods, showing him that she understands, and continues to stare blankly at the screen. Petra looks awkward, if not uncomfortable. The cameraman signals Isabel that she is going off air in a few seconds, so she says, "And that's it for us with Petra Ral from the Supernovas! We enjoyed talking with you, Petra." Isabel gives her a cheeky grin.

"Always a pleasure talking to you, Isabel," Petra answers politely, like she is trained to do. Levi scoffs as he rubs his temples slowly. He really needed a drink, because he feels suffocated. It's like someone's rubbing salt in old wounds that never had the time to heal. He feels bitterness flowing through his bloodstream, and it's not going to flush out anytime soon.

Isabel faces the camera, and with a cheeky grin, she signs off. "This has been Isabel Magnolia reporting from the Gold Room. Back to you, Farlan." The screen switches to Farlan Church, the main anchor of the _New Year's Party_. He announces the line up one more time before going to commercial. Levi doesn't really feel like listening to Nile and the Doks, so he gets up and stretches.

Facing Mikasa, he asks, "Do you need anything? Drinks? Snacks?" She thinks about it for a few seconds before answering with water and grapes. Levi nods and exits the room quietly, only to come face to face with Erwin.

Erwin gives him a questioning look before asking, "What were you doing in my room?"

Levi shrugs and says, "I was checking up on Claire, and I found that Mikasa was there too." He scrubbed at a dirty smudge on his shoe with his other shoe, really using anything to divert his attention from Erwin's interrogative blue eyes.

Erwin lets Levi off the hook and nods slowly. "Did you see the interview?" Levi scoffs again, cracking his knuckles halfway through.

"There's a damn TV in every room, Erwin. I don't think anyone can hide it from me."

"I..." he says, pausing a bit. Erwin takes a deep sigh and exhales the rest of what he has to say. "I never got to apologize for that."

"It's fine," Levi says bluntly, eyes focusing on the closed bathroom door behind Erwin. Someone's behind that door and will surely interrupt their awkward conversation. He's already starting to count down. "We never were a couple anyway. None of it is your fault."

"I can't help but take responsibility, Levi," Erwin says almost hesitatingly. Of course Erwin knows this subject strikes a bad chord in Levi, and it should be obvious that he's already starting to get pissed. "If I didn't meddle with your love life, you wouldn't have been--"

"Drop it," Levi grunts out. A flushing noise comes from the bathroom, signaling to Levi that their conversation is almost finished. "I don't care about her. I don't care about anyone. Just do me a favor and mind your own god damn business." Levi really needs a drink now because his head is pounding. The sink is turned on, and someone is washing their hands. Levi needs them to hurry the fuck up because this conversation is going downhill by the minute.

"Levi," Erwin mumbles, but Levi is quick to silence him.

"Erwin, please," he says in pleading voice. "You've got your own life. Your personal life isn't as a mess as mine is, so cherish that. Don't screw up with Mikasa, alright?" This part of Levi hasn't come out in a long time, even Erwin's surprised by it. Levi cracks a smile against his will and says, "Enjoy. You deserve it."

Erwin nods quickly, and the door to the bathroom swings wide open. It's Reiner, hands wiping at his shirt and fly still waiting to be zipped up. He looks up at the two men with wide eyes. "Did I interrupt something? I'm really sorry."

Erwin gives him a tight smile. "I was just going to check on Mikasa. You?"

"Claire," he answers. "Levi? What are you doing here?"

"Went to check on Claire," he tells him, "but Mikasa requested a few snacks, so I'm off to get those."

Erwin stares at Levi, obviously stunned by the new information. "I can get those for her. You can stay here with her." Levi shakes his head and gives Erwin a nudge towards the room.

"She's your girlfriend. Go check on her. I'll be back soon."

Of course, Levi rushes to get everything to Mikasa, but when he enters the room, he sees that she's a bit too preoccupied to notice him. He leaves her grapes and water on the dresser and slips away unnoticed.

That's how it always is, so there’s no difference there.

 

***

 

The minute the clock strikes twelve, everyone's up on their feet and is happily screaming happy new year's in a loud voice (even Annie, surprisingly.) It's new news to Levi that he's still sober. It's weird that he hasn't touched a wine glass until now.

Hanji's running around, hugging everyone tightly. When she gets to Levi, he can smell the three glasses of wine she drank, and he just _knows_ that her hangover tomorrow morning is going to be the worst.

Sasha and Connie are making out in their corner, and Jean's already pinned Marco to the wall, lips dangerously close to Marco's gaping mouth. Eren looks nonchalantly pissed at Jean, because Levi can see him glaring at them from the corner of his eye while talking to Armin. Krista and Ymir took off to the hotel pool to do who knows what. Mike's tailing Hanji, Erwin's pecking Mikasa's cheek, and Bertholdt is sharing a drink with Annie and Reiner in front of the big flat screen in the middle of the room depicting what the hell is going on outside. It looks fucking cold, so Levi takes note to bring his biggest parka, if Erwin manages to book them at next year's _New Year's Party_.

Leaving Armin’s side and ignoring Jean and Marco, Eren slings his arm around Levi’s shoulders. His breath smells of cheap beer mixed with expensive wine, and that smell isn’t very nice. He coughs before talking. “Happy new year, pal!” Eren says in a cheery voice, patting Levi’s back continuously. “Aren’t the fireworks beautiful?”

“They’re only on screen,” Levi tells him, and Eren laughs even harder. He smacks Levi’s back again. The weight of Eren’s hand on his back actually hurts. It feels so heavy, and it’s kind of like he’s forcing all his anger out on Levi’s back. Good for Eren that he’s channeling his anger through something that’s not violence, but bad for Levi because he’s at the brunt of it. _Again_.

“It’s still beautiful,” Eren says, eyes still glued to the screen. Levi can see Isabel kiss a random man on screen, like she does every year. Tradition, probably. This year, it’s a police officer. Last year it was a fireman. It’s a different occupation each year, and each guy seems to enjoy it. She looks like she enjoys it too, but that’s probably because she’s piss drunk, like everyone else is.

This is how Levi imagined everything to be. This is how it was last year, and he assumes that this is how it will be every year. Everything is as expected.

But what he didn't expect is Mikasa brushing against his back and whispering "happy new year" in a tone that only he could hear.

Maybe this New Year's is better than he expected it to be.

 

***

 

They leave New York the next day and head towards Philadelphia. Of course, mostly everyone is hungover. Eren's taken up the bus’s bathroom the most, and Jean’s already thrown up in the sink. Since no one wants to wait until Jean sobers up enough to clean his mess, poor Connie is stuck with the job of cleaning it up (he’s the most sober out of the three.) The bus is quiet despite Connie’s incessant gagging. Levi almost yells at him to shut up, but he finishes cleaning up before Levi could reach his boiling point.

 

No one’s really of interest, so Levi doesn’t talk to anyone on the bus. He gets stuck with the people that annoyed him the most; Mikasa, Erwin, and Annie are all in a different car, so he can’t really talk to anyone besides Hanji, but Hanji is still knocked out from last night.

Mike’s reading some biography of someone Levi doesn't recognize, and once he gets his nose into a book, it's hard to get him out. Levi can't talk to Mike either anyway. Eren can't speak coherently; he has no business with Jean; Connie is knocked out from cleaning Jean's vomit; Sasha is chatting on the phone with a crew member; Bertholdt's making a cheese sandwich, and Ymir's too busy texting Krista (who is stuck with Erwin, Armin, and Annie.) Levi notices that Reiner's up at the front of the bus with Marco and has left Claire to sit awkwardly by herself. Seeing that he hasn't really made contact with her since New York, he decides to talk to her.

"Hey," he says quietly, silently taking a seat next to her. "Can I sit here?" She nods without making a sound, and Levi nods back, not really knowing what to do or what to say next. "I--uh, are you having fun?"

"Yes," she says mutely. It's odd that she's being quiet now, because back at New York, she was really coming out of her shell and had talked to mostly everyone in the main crew. She even talked to Jean, and that takes courage, especially for the shy ones. Jean looks scary even though he really is just a big fucking dork. Even with his appearance, Claire managed to talk to him freely. Now, it seems like she can't talk at all.

"You used to talk a lot," Levi tells her, looking down. Her dull blue eyes stare at the empty booth across from them, never blinking once. "Now you don't. What's up with that?"

She sniffs and wipes her sleeve along her top lip. "Auntie Mikasa isn't here to protect me," she whispers airily. Ah, now Levi understands. Since Mikasa is no longer here, she feels threatened and unsafe. Mikasa's her protector, the one that tells her that everything is going to be okay and that the world isn't going to end.

"Look," he says lightly, not wanting to scare her away. "If you keep your true self inside, how can we protect you? Do you understand?" She nods slowly, eyes flickering quickly to look at him. It doesn't feel uncomfortable as it usually does. Levi feels sort of looked up to (although he wonders why anyone would do that.) "And hey," he adds, nudging her a little bit while cracking a slight smile, "if Auntie Mikasa or Daddy aren't here to protect you, Uncle Levi definitely will. Okay?"

She nods, the same smile she gave to Mikasa days ago emerging from underneath. "Okay," she repeats confidently.

"Do you want to go say hi to Daddy?" he asks her, and she nods quickly. When they both stand up, Levi feels a small, soft hand clutching his big, rough ones. And to his surprise, it feels sort of good to have a hand to hold. Maybe it comes with the good feeling of having someone to protect.

 

***

 

They get to the hotel on schedule, much to Sasha's relief. She gets all the roadies (who are mostly sober now) to work on getting everyone's stuff out of the bus and into the hotel before they have to drive to the venue and set the stage up.

Levi's still holding Claire's hand. She won't let go until after they're safely in the hotel, but Levi doesn't mind. It's fun to small talk with her, and he really can't believe that's happening because he knows for sure he's shit at it. But with Claire, it's easy to talk about small things. Maybe it's because she's still a child--a young and naive one at that. It’s always easy to talk to people that are like him anyways.

After getting everyone checked in, Annie gives out the keys. “It’s basically the same set up,” she says, tapping at her iPhone. “A few changes though. Reiner and Bertholdt are in the same room with Claire, Marco’s with Armin, Eren’s with Jean, Connie’s with Sasha. Levi gets a room alone. Other than that, we’ve got the same room assignments.”

Jean raises his hand, and Annie nods at him to show acknowledgement. “Is it too late to change roommates? Can I have Levi instead?” Eren scowls at Jean and Levi scoffs.

“I’d rather shit in a pot,” Levi shoots at him, rolling his eyes. Mikasa slaps his back lightly.

“There is a _child_ here, Rivaille,” she mumbles, “watch your potty mouth.”

“Sorry,” he mumbles. Mikasa laughs a little bit while glancing at Claire.

“Don’t you dare say those words, or else you’ll get a spanking from Daddy.” Mikasa bends down and looks her straight in the eyes. It’s kind of scary from Levi’s perspective. Her eyes look like they’re burning into Claire, but at the same time, soft and caring--much like a mother. Reiner laughs from a distance but doesn’t do anything to stop her. A lesson’s a lesson, and children have to learn. “Understand?” Mikasa asks sternly.

“Understood,” Claire answers, smiling widely. “I will never say bad words because bad words are bad!”

“That’s right,” Mikasa praises her. She high fives Claire then gives her a tight hug. “I’m very proud of you.”

Mikasa glances at Annie and nods, and Annie does the same. “I guess it’s settled then,” Annie says, looking at Jean from the corner of her eye. “We’ll meet here after lunch.”

Everyone rushes up to their rooms to get at least some sleep before Sasha or Annie could yell at them.

 

***

 

Levi’s usually a heavy sleeper, so he doesn’t understand why the fuck he can’t sleep. It’s already past midnight, and every time he closes his eyes, he opens them five seconds later.

He likes to call himself an insomniac. Self-diagnosed, he may be, but he’s got all the symptoms. He takes sleeping pills every night just so he can get lucky and sleeps for a few hours (usually five or six, depending on the day.)  But the sleeping pills aren’t working tonight, he’s tossing and turning even though he’s already fucking exhausted. It’s bad enough that Sasha chewed him out for screwing with the wires backstage, but Mikasa snapped at him too for ruining the make up she was testing to hide his deep eyebags. He needs sleep, but his body won’t allow it.

How shitty is that?

He groans, throwing the hot pillow at the floor. His eyes are already dropping, his body fatigued, and his mind is blank. He really, really needs sleep or else he won’t function right tomorrow, and if he doesn’t function right, everyone’s day will turn into hell.

Reiner once told him, _“First thing to do when you’re feeling overwhelmed is to clear out everything in your mind, or else you won’t sleep. It’s easy, really. Just think about a blank slate and boom! Your mind is cleared.”_

Yeah, _“easy.”_ Usually, when Reiner talks about health stuff, it’s true, but that’s not true now. There’s so many things that he can’t forget because forgetting isn’t that simple. Some things are too traumatic or too special to forget. Sometimes, you need help to forget about stuff. The easy stuff anyways.

That’s why he texts Annie to meet him downstairs by the entrance of the hotel garden. Quickly, he put on clean sweatpants and throws on a suitable shirt before slipping a grey hoodie on and heading out of his room. He keeps his head down and walks quickly to the elevators, and he doesn’t look up until he’s in it.

 

**The fuck do you need, shorty?**

_Shorty? That’s not very nice._

**Well, I’m not very nice. What do you need?**

_Spare me the questions please. Just meet me downstairs._

**Christ. You want me to come downstairs in the middle of the night with no reason whatsoever. What are you, twelve?**

_I don’t think I owe you an explanation until you come down._

 

A ding signals Levi to get off the elevator, and he does, but his eyes are still glued to the screen. Annie isn’t being very cooperative, and that’s very frustrating.

 

**Yeah? Well then, I don’t think I need to go downstairs.**

_ANNIE._

**Honestly, just tell me. I’m not gonna come downstairs until you do.**

_Christ, fine. Okay. I just want to talk._

**Levi? Talking with me? What did I do to deserve such an honor?**

_Cut the bullshit, kid._

**You can’t expect me to come downstairs just to talk. That’s a pretty weak reason, if you ask me.**

_I’m not asking you if that’s a pretty weak reason. I’m asking you to come downstairs because I can’t fucking sleep and I need to talk to someone. You’re the person I trust the most._

**You can’t talk to Erwin?**

_..._

_I don’t think I can talk to Erwin about this._

 

Levi sits at a tiny booth at the hotel’s twenty-four hour cafe. The waitress at the counter gives him odd looks and ignores him for the most part. He’s ignoring her too. He just needs Annie to hurry up and text back, because the clock is ticking and he really needs to go to bed.

**Be truthful for once. What’s this about?**

_Honestly? Not sure. But I think it has something to do with Mikasa._

 

She doesn’t answer for a few minutes. He’s scared her off probably. That is the worst thing he could do. Right when he stands to go back up to his room, his phone turns on and notifies him that he’s got a message.

 

**Buy me a coffee. I’ll be there in a few minutes.**

 

He smiles to himself and stuffs his phone into his pocket. Standing from his spot, he heads towards the counter and looks for the strongest coffee on the menu.

 

***

 

“Americano, how did you know?” Annie asks as she sips the warm coffee Levi bought for her. He shrugs, pushing the gate to the garden open and shutting it once she enters.

“You never sleep,” he says. “Erwin told me that.”

“I guess that’s a perk,” she mumbles, slowly sipping more coffee from her grande-sized cup. “You know, being best friends with the boss. He’ll know what coffee you like, and he’ll tell his friend, so in a situation like this, I can blackmail that stupid friend into getting me some coffee so I can stay up for another five hours.”

The night is cold and dark, but the street lamps definitely help to guide them through the pathways. It’s colder than Levi expected, probably under fifty degrees, but Levi’s always been shit at guessing temperature. The moon shines brightly too, adding more light to the beautiful rose garden. It would be an ideal spot to write songs, but Annie’s loud sipping is getting in the way of him relaxing.

“You sip too loudly,” he says bluntly, and in response, she rolls her eyes.

“Does it look like I give a shit?”

“No wonder I trust you so much. You’re as dull as I am.”

She scoffs, sounding a bit offended. “You’re duller than I am, promise.” She sips again before throwing the cup in a conveniently placed trashcan. “You wanted to talk about Mikasa?”

Ah, yes. That. He supposes that’s what he was thinking about while he was tossing in bed. Though it wasn’t a clear picture, he can see the outline of her scarf when he closed his eyes. It was odd, because he never thought about her more than six seconds. But she was the only thing he could see, the only thing he could think about, when he laid in bed.

“It’s just weird,” he says, kicking a pebble with his right boot. They’re very scuffed up, but that’s how they should be. He’s had them since he was in college, and they’ve never failed him. That’s why they’re his favorite pair. “When I try to sleep, I can’t.”

Annie snorts, turning her head to a big rose bush beside her. “All of us can’t sleep, Levi. That’s how this life is.” She says it as if it is fact, and Levi supposes that it’s true. But at the same time, she shouldn’t be interrupting him. That’s very _rude_.

“You’re making this difficult to explain,” he snaps at her. She scoffs, turns around, and walks back to the entrance. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”

“Going back,” she says simply, walking agonizingly slow. “If you’re going to keep talking to me like that, then I won’t listen. I didn’t come down here to be yelled at.”

He huffs, arms crossing. He doesn’t want to apologize, because his pride’s too big to do that. But he really needs to talk to her or else he’ll explode and he’ll never sleep again, which is fine. But he’d prefer to go to bed. Hesitatingly, he groans, “ _Fine_. Sorry Annie. Can we continue talking?”

“Ah, now that’s better,” she says, smiling sarcastically, and Levi can practically feel the hate growing in his throat. (Levi feels hate _everywhere_ , honestly. It’s just this time, it’s in a lump in between his head and neck.) “What were we talking about?”

“I can’t sleep,” he deadpans, but he adds soon after, “because I think about Mikasa.”

Annie stops, slowly turns her head towards Levi, and asks, “What did you say?” It looks like she’s a bit surprised to hear this from him. Her eyes are slightly widened and her mouth is gaping just a little bit. Levi shakes his head and looks down.

“I said it once, so I’m not repeating it again.”

Annie hums and pats Levi’s back softly. “Thinking about Mikasa at night? You’re crushing on her now, huh?”

“I don’t know,” he admits, rubbing his eyes a little it. He doesn’t know why he’s confessing this to her. Maybe it’s because he doesn’t get enough sleep. “Honestly, I think I’m just tired. These thoughts will pass.”

Annie laughs a little bit before grinning evily at him. “Oh, no. Yeah, I don’t believe that. I know your tradition thing. You asked her to fucking kiss you for god’s sakes, don’t tell me you’re backing out now.”

“We’re friends--”

“Friends my _ass_.” Annie’s being quite bold tonight. Levi doesn’t know whether it’s because of the moon giving her some extra power, or if it’s stress pouring out of her. “You like her. Admit it.”

He pauses and thinks about it for awhile. After a few minutes pass, he groans and rubs his eyes even more. “I can’t fucking believe this.”

“I knew it,” she says, and that’s all she says. “Goodnight, Levi. We had a great talk.” Slowly, she turns around and heads back to the hotel without saying so much as a goodbye.

“But--” Levi says, but he cuts himself short. He watches her slim figure walk back to the shimmering lights the hotel is emitting. At this point, he doesn’t know whether Annie is a friend or an enemy. She’s Mikasa’s best friend, but he supposes she is one of his good friends too.

He scoffs, shakes his head, and starts to walk back to the hotel too. Now he knows for sure that someone is definitely on his side, and that makes him feel really good and somewhat at peace. He can finally go to sleep.

 

***

 

“Wake the fuck up!”

That’s what jolted Levi awake. Most of the team is crowding around his bed. Sasha’s leaning against the wall, tsking and shaking her head as she taps her iPad repeatedly. Annie looks very pissed, her face is very red and her eyes look like they’re ready to kill him. Levi just groans. He turns around and covers his head with his blanket because he’s not ready to be killed by Annie yet.

“Leave me alone.”

“Bad move,” Ymir laughs in the background. He can hear a slap and Ymir whining Krista’s name. Meanwhile, Annie’s trying to claw off his sheets. He is totally going to die a horrible death.

“Listen up, you little shit,” Annie growls, snatching the top corner of his sheets and ripping them off. “I’m giving you to the count of three to get up, and if you don’t, I’m going to have to get Ymir to carry your short ass downstairs, boxers and all.”

Levi groans in response, and that causes Annie to start her countdown.

“One,” she says in a warning tone. Eren snickers and whines Mikasa after she hits him. All are in a five second time frame, like always. Levi’s body still won’t get up because he’s too tired to do anything. (He’s even too tired to get up and slap Eren. That’s a first.)

“Two,” Annie continues, growling it out this time. She really isn’t kidding about this. Levi knows that they have a show today, and he knows they’re supposed to be there before noon. It couldn’t be noon though, could it? He doesn’t sleep for more than six hours, but if it is noon, then he’s slept at least eight hours now. He doesn’t regret it though; it feels very refreshing.

“Alright, _three_ ,” she hisses, clicking her fingers to signal Ymir. Ymir slowly heads towards Levi’s bed, but before she can take another step, he slowly gets up and walks silently to the bathroom. After shutting the door for privacy, he sits on the toilet for awhile. There’s a knock on the door right when he is just about to doze back into sleep.

“We’re heading downstairs now.” It’s Mikasa, voice calmer than it usually is. “We’re all heading off without you, but Eren and Sasha are staying to drive you to the venue.”

He mumbles a slow _thanks_ and listens to her footsteps as she walks away.

It’s dull in the bathroom. All the gold pieces don’t really coordinate with the porcelain sink and tub. It’s a bit overpowering to see, and Levi has to squint if he wants to see himself properly brushing his teeth. Once he finishes, he exits the bathroom to look for a suit to wear to the venue.

He’s always prefered suits. They’re stylish, and people have immediate respect for the person wearing the suit. The suit holds unattainable power that any other piece of clothing doesn’t have. He can’t bring himself to wear anything else outside. People wouldn’t treat him the same way when he just wore a ratty band tee and jeans. When they see him wearing a sharp, expensive suit with an expensive watch to match, they give him the best. And that’s all he wants in life. _The best._

After putting on his suit, he rolls his neck and gives himself a bit of pep talk (because it takes a lot of strength to go outside and face the world) before he heads out the room. An elevator ride later, he meets Sasha, who is too interested in her phone to greet him, and Eren, who gives him an immediate greeting, downstairs.

“Good morning, Levi,” Eren says a bit too forwardly. Levi narrows his eyes at him.

“What happened? Why are you so excited? Did Hanji get to you?” Sasha snorts at his snide comment, but she doesn’t look up from her phone. Eren just rolls his eyes and smacks the back of Levi’s head.

“Hanji is a very cool person, I’ll let you know,” he says. “And no, it’s just a beautiful morning. I feel more energetic.”

“Ah, alright,” Levi says. He pulls the two by the wrist, and a few objections pass above his head before he tells them, “Let’s go. We’re going to be late.”

Of course, Sasha doesn’t let that comment slide by. She yells out, “Yeah! Thanks to you!” before being stuffed in the car next to Eren.

 

***

 

Erwin slips into his dressing room after they finished setting everything up. Levi doesn’t look up, he doesn’t look at him, and his gaze is still on the phone he has in his hands. Erwin sits on the couch and continues to stare at Levi.

“You look like you’re relaxed.” It’s all he says. His eyes move to the basket of complimentary cookies the stadium gave to Levi as a gift, and he takes one without asking (not that it bothered Levi at all.)

“Got enough sleep for once, that’s all,” Levi answers, eyes still fixed on his phone. Honestly, he’s not even doing anything, but he can’t seem to get himself to look at Erwin. It’s as if he’s mad at him, but he doesn’t know what for.

“I came in to ask,” Erwin starts, taking in a deep breath before exhaling the rest out, “about your opinion on my proposal to Mikasa.”

This isn’t new news to Levi (he’s known that this was going to happen at some point), but for some reason, his ears perk up and his gaze is suddenly on Erwin. “What?”

“Do you think I’m going too fast?” Erwin asks him. He’s obviously serious about it, because he’s talking in such a soft tone. And it kills Levi. It kills him that Erwin’s so serious, because that destroys any chance he has. “I mean, we’ve been dating for a few years now.”

Levi doesn’t know how to respond. His heart is going a hundred miles per hour, and he doesn’t fucking know why. He doesn’t know a lot of things--like why he thinks about Mikasa so fucking much, and why he cares about their engagement, and why his heart keeps beating when the word engagement or proposal comes out of Erwin’s or Annie’s mouth. Hurt, angry, upset--he feels it all. He just doesn’t know why.

“That’s good,” he mumbles. His eyes move back to the screen. “I think you should go for it.”

“Really?” Erwin asks enthusiastically. His eyes even _twinkle_ , and Levi doesn’t want to take that away. He’d be a bad friend if he did.

“Yeah,” he replies, his breath stuck in a lump in his throat. “Really.”

Erwin once told him that he was a man of many talents, yet he doesn’t know when he acquired the talent to lie.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> summary of this chapter: levi and petra are really hot exes, annie's a part-time therapist, and eren really likes to kiss ass. (also: connie can clean up vomit really well, but not without gagging noises. those must be made.)

**Author's Note:**

> follow my [twitter](http://twitter.com/oikawaist) for updates on this fic! (in addition to that, i will be posting about my life and you will see how lame i actually am, but it's worth it.)
> 
> i like to see feedback, so if you want, comment about something you liked or talk to me about something that confused you. i will always comment back. 
> 
> as always, thank you for reading! it means a lot to me, you guys mean a lot to me, and you guys are the reason that's keeping this fic strong. love you all!
> 
> edit 01/16/17: i wrote this way back when i didn't know they were related. i don't support incestuous relationships. and, as a note, i will no longer be writing for this fic. thank you.


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